Misconceptions
by Alphie
Summary: After the war, Remus and Tonks face an unexpected change in their realtionship.
1. Chapter 1

AN: For those of you familiar with my other fiction, I'm sure you will find this to be quite different. It's a much darker story than I have ever written with mature themes. It's also my first try at Remus/Tonks. I hope you find it interesting enough to come back for more. Many thanks to Durayan, Pelirroja, and Gryffinjack for their help with beta reading and tweaking the story so it all fits together. You guys rox!

1**Chapter One**

9 Feb, 9:47 pm

Why do Muggles think getting pissed in a smoky pub is sexy?

_The thought had crossed her mind a dozen times this evening, and she still had no good answer. No one could call this place romantic. Blaring music made it nearly impossible to hear any conversation without yelling. People were jammed up against one another, grinding their bodies in an attempt to arouse the person they were next to. The stench of sweat mixed with beer and smoke was overwhelming. It was just the sort of place Nymphadora Tonks hated. _

_Mandy Grissom, however, was having the time of her life. Tonks was actually enjoying it, too, but on an entirely different level. Pretending to be someone that you are not was always entertaining, especially when it came with the chance to lock up several Death Eaters and take down a woman you despised. The only regret Tonks had about the whole situation was that it made her feel…well…_dirty_. Not dirty in the sense of perversion, but honestly fifthly, slimy, sticky…dirty. _

_Yet, she knew it was the best place to get what she wanted – more specifically _whom_ she wanted. Unfortunately, Darrius LaMont – or as he had introduced himself to her, David Monty, was currently in the loo. Not an original name, but then Darrius LaMont wasn't too bright. _

_Tonks had been following him here for a week now, keeping a close eye on which ladies he favored, and how he dealt with them. He always gravitated towards blondes who had too much to drink. Darrius really went for that type, proving to Tonks how truly trite his tastes were. The women never seemed to be anything but the all fur coat and no knickers type. They would _have_ to be brainless to go home with him, but that's exactly what they all did. Sick, really, but tonight she would make it work to her advantage. _

_With her hair as white blonde as she could make it, and her chest as inflated as her breasts would go, Tonks had morphed herself into the perfect trap for Darrius. He spotted her right away and made a beeline straight for her. His pick up line had been one of the worst she had ever heard, but she laughed and giggled and stuck out her chest, playing the tart to perfection. _

_He bought her several drinks, cheap drinks to be precise, most of which Tonks managed to spill here and there to avoid truly having to drink them. She would laugh loudly at some stupid comment of his and, in what she hoped appeared like a drunken stupor, would spill some liquid over the rim of the glass. The floor was so sticky no one would notice the spill anyway. _

_The more their conversation progressed, the more Tonks wondered how this man ever managed to attract women at all. He knew nothing about the art of flirtation, not to mention the fact that he really wasn't that good looking, though he seemed to think otherwise. And yet, Darrius had taken home a different woman every night this week. _

_She glanced over at a handsome, olive skinned man in the corner to find him sitting alone. Zach raised his eyebrows at her suggestively, obviously having a good time watching her play the tart. It was astonishing to Tonks that Darrius had loads of women and Zack had none. Then again, Zach was trying to keep himself hidden as much as he could. It was his job to be her back up, and it wouldn't do for him to become distracted from the task at hand. _

_The feel of a hand rubbing up her back snapped Tonks out of her thoughts. Darrius smiled a twisted smile at her. It was a look that he used all the time, and it sickened her. But at least it signaled that he was ready to get on with the evening's festivities. _

_Sure enough, he made his predictable move. She had seen him use the same tactic on three other women, so it wasn't much of a surprise at this point, but she kept her eyes wide all the same. _

"_You want to get out of her and make some _magic_?" he shouted at her over the roar of the pub._

"_Magic?" she said with a wiggle of her hips. "What kind of magic did you have in mind?"_

"_The real kind."_

"_Real?" she teased. "Are you a magician?"_

"_Hardly. Magicians have tricks up their sleeves."_

"_And where do you keep your wand?" she asked suggestively._

_He flinched just a bit. "Who said I had a wand?"_

_Tonks smiled brightly. "Don't all magicians have a magic wand?" she covered. _

_He relaxed slightly and said, "I've got one hell of a powerful magic wand that I'm just aching to show you."_

_She looked up at him through her eyelashes and nibbled on a long fingernail. "I'll bet! And I suppose you are an expert at using it."_

"_Baby, you have no idea. It's my job."_

"_You're job?" she sounded surprised. "You mean you're a gigolo?" she said with an air of stupidity._

"_Bloody hell! My magic is worth more than that."_

"_Then what are you?"_

"_I'm a wizard, doll. I'm one of the most wanted wizards in the world. The stuff I've done is legendary."_

"_Oh, come on," she said rolling her eyes at him. He was taking the bait: hook, line, and sinker. _

_He raised his eyebrows, "You don't believe me? Sweetheart, I'm so powerful, I can kill people with one thought."_

"_No! Really?" she mocked at him._

"_Simple flick of the wrist is all it takes."_

_She shrugged, "If you say so, I guess." She leaned back against the bar, resting on her elbows, which only amplified her swollen bosom._

_His eyes traveled over her curves. He smirked and took a step closer to her, obviously not liking the fact that she didn't believe him and his magical story. "And what if I can prove it to you?"_

"_I'd love to see you prove it!" she said a tad too quickly. "I mean…cursing someone."_

_His eyes narrowed into slits. "I don't usually like an audience when I work."_

"_Oh, well…" she said in a demure manner. "How am I supposed to believe you're a wizard if you won't let me watch?"_

_His smile was pure evil. "You are a kinky one. I like that in a girl."_

_She wiggled her body up next to his. "And I like powerful men."_

"_Well, I do have an assignment, if you're up for it."_

"_Depends on whom we're cursing," she stated, using her best impression of a dim-witted adolescent. "Anyone I'd know?"_

"_Doubt it. Just some old bag of bones who's been causing my boss trouble."_

_She wet her lips. "Well, I'd love to see you work. Are you sure I wouldn't get in the way?"_

"_Hold that thought," he said placing a finger on her pouting lips. "Give me a minute, and I'll see what I can do." He dragged a finger over her chin before sliding off his stool. With a nod, she let him go and watched as he strolled to the washroom. _

_Tonks shivered in revulsion once he was gone. She wasn't too sure why he always waited until the last second to take care of business in the loo, but that was his routine. He'd done it with all the others. It was actually quite fortuitous since it gave Tonks a moment to signal to Zach that they would be leaving soon. To a casual observer, it would look as if Tonks were merely redoing her cherry colored lipstick; however, Zach understood the signal. He gave an almost imperceptible nod of his head, and left the pub for the designated meeting place. It wouldn't be long before Tonks would join him there. _

_After ten minutes of wondering if Darrius had gone arse over kettle on the floor of the loo, Tonks at long last spotted him swaggering towards her. He gave a wink to the bartender and said, "Come on, babe, have one more drink and then let's get some privacy."_

_This was new. She hadn't ever seen him buy a drink after a loo visit. He'd always been too anxious to make "magic" with his lady friends. He'd never wasted time on a last drink before, and this made Tonks a bit nervous._

"_One for the road," he added when Tonks looked skeptical. He handed her the beer and she took a sip with a flirty smile._

"_No, no. Drink up. It will help you not feel so nervous." He tipped the glass up to her lips and nearly shoved it down her throat. _

_Tonks choked and coughed and pushed the glass away, forcing a smile on her lips. "I'm good. I'm not nervous at all."_

"_Yeah, but you're chatty. And I don't like the chatty kind."_

_There was an edge to his voice she didn't leave her feeling comfortable. When he grabbed her upper arm and started dragging her to the front door, she knew something wasn't quite right. _

"_Hey, don't be so rough!" she managed once they were out in the cold night air._

"_I like it rough, baby." He pulled her against him and squeezed her bum with both hands._

"_Whoa!" she said, pushing away from him and nearly falling backwards from a sudden dizzy feeling. "You're a feisty one!" she said, trying to recover. _

"_You haven't seen anything yet."_

_A warning signal went up in Tonks' mind. She had to keep him at bay long enough to get the information she needed. "Now what about this magic trick? Who are we going to kill?"_

"_Don't you mean curse?"_

"_Curse…kill…whatever."_

"_Uh uh," he shook his head at her. "_You _know there's a big difference between a simple curse and the killing curse, don't you?"_

_She felt light headed. "I don't know what you're talking about."_

"_I think you do. I think you know all about magic."_

_The warning she felt earlier was now screaming at her to run. "Maybe I should just…"  
_

_Before she could turn away, Darrius grabbed her. "I don't think so, baby. I'm too turned on right now. And you're going to drop the act and tell me who you really are." He rubbed his pelvis against her._

_She tried not to look disgusted, but knew she was running out of time. She pushed him away again, her mind going a bit fuzzy. "No! I don't know what you're even talking about!" She could hardly focus anymore. _

_He froze and gazed at her with dangerous eyes. "I thought you might say that."_

_Her blood ran cold. "What do you mean?" _

_He chuckled. "You've got about ten seconds till bed time, baby."_

_Tonks gasped. "What?"_

"_Nighty-night."_

_She turned to run, but the world went black before she even managed to take a step._

10: 52 pm that same night

_Someone was kissing her neck. Hot breath was covering her skin. Lips pressed urgently against her pulse point._

What the…?

A hand covered her breast and gave a tight squeeze. It was flesh to flesh. She wasn't wearing a shirt. The same hand moved down her stomach and below her waist.

What's going on?

A knee pressed her legs apart. Again, it was flesh to flesh.

Tonks opened her eyes to find a man kneeling above her.

His face was menacing and lustful. "Wakey, wakey. It's time you joined the party!"

He lowered his mouth to hers and she screamed. Almost reflexively her knee came up to meet his groin. He cried out in pain and she shoved him off of her. She scrambled to get off the bed, but his large hands grabbed her.

"Wait a second, what do-." She saw stars as he cracked her across the mouth; trickle of blood stained the pillow.

"Oh no you don't! You're way to mouthy for your own good, and I don't like the chatty type!"

He held her wrists over her head with one hand and reached for something on the nightstand with his other. Her body was still sluggish from the potion that must have been in that last beer, but she fought back as best as she could. The stiletto, calf-high leather boots she had worn still concealed her wand. If only she could free her hand long enough to reach it.

Tonks' mind was racing; her only thoughts were of getting free from him. And then she saw what he was going for…his wand. With all the strength she could muster, she wrenched free from his grasp and grabbed for his wand. She twisted and writhed under the weight of his body in a desperate struggle for control of the wand. Her left hand scratched his rib cage as her right hand grabbed at his wand. All she could do was reach his wrist, but that was enough.

"Let go!" he ordered.

"Never!" she cried out. Finally, with a sudden twist that caught off guard, Tonks jabbed the tip of the wand painfully into thehis flesh of his side. "_INCENDIO_!"

Flames burst from the tip, scalding his bare skin. He screamed and rolled off the bed, waving his arms in an attempt to stop the fire.

Tonks didn't hesitate. She scurried off the bed and grabbed her coat draped over the chair. She quickly bent down, grabbed her wand out of her boot, and_ Disapparated._ There was no time to gather up anything else.

A moment later she found herself in the middle of her bedroom, safe from harm. For the first time she could really consider what had just happened. She glanced down at her body and shivered, hugging the coat to her. _How could I be so stupid? _She could smell him on the fabric…feel his sweat on her skin. It left her completely nauseated. She dropped the coat, kicked off the boots, and headed straight into the bathroom.

Stepping into the shower, she turned the water as hot as she could make it. The heat was scalding, but she didn't care. She had to get him off of her. She lathered up the soap and scrubbed and scrubbed until her skin was nearly raw. Feeling suddenly weak and light headed, she sat down in the shower and let the water fall around her as tears started to fill her eyes.

Stupid…stupid…STUPID!

There was a knock on the door followed by an inquiring voice shouting at her. "Dora? Are you all right?"

It was Zach.

"What happened? I got worried when you didn't show up at the cabin?"

"I'm fine," she managed. "I'm just taking a shower," she said in a voice that was surprisingly strong.

"Tonks?" a second, harsher voice said, causing her to jump. "I want to know what happened."

It was Moody. Zach must have gone for help when she didn't show up on time. She rolled her eyes and turned off the water, knowing that the men wouldn't leave her alone until they had some answers. She stifled her sobs and told herself to get a grip. Stepping out of the shower, she wrapped a towel around her body and opened the door just a crack.

"I just wanted to wash the smoke out of my hair," she said not looking at them.

"I can see that." He noted dryly. "What I'm interested in knowing is why you left your back up?"

"I didn't…leave really. I just…"

Through the crack she could see Moody's magical eye focused directly on her. He could see her. _Damn it!_

"Is that a bruise on your face? Open this door!"

She reluctantly did as she was ordered, slowly revealing her dishevelled and now dripping wet self to her colleagues.

Zach gasped.

"What the bloody hell happened to you?" Moody asked gruffly.

"Things didn't go as planned."

"Obviously. Go on," he said when she paused and looked away.

"I thought I had convinced him to take me on his next assignment, but I guess…I was too willing. I wasn't convincing enough for him."

"So he landed a punch before you could get to your wand?"

"Not at first, no." Tonks lowered herself to the bed, keeping her eyes on the floor. "He drugged me. I was so _stupid_! I should have known better."

"He drugged you and then beat you?" asked Zach, taking a seat next to her on the bed. His eyes travelled over to the meagre clothing pile.

She looked up at him slowly. She wasn't comfortable explaining everything with Moody standing there. "No…no. We struggled and I…got hold of his wand."

"Tell me you didn't accidentally kill him." Moody frowned.

"No. I wanted to, but I didn't." Darrius had important information about the surviving Death Eaters, specifically where to locate Bellatrix Lastrange. The Ministry needed him alive. She knew killing him would have placed her in even deeper trouble than she was in right now.

Moody turned his focus to Zach. "How many times have I told the two of you, CONSTANT VIGILENCE? Laddie, where were you whilst this was happening?"

"I was at the cabin. Darrius took all of his girls there."

"Correction, all the girls except Tonks." Moody paced the room, the clunk of his wooden leg pounding out the fact that he was observably angry with the two of them. "So let me get this straight. First Garcia leaves you alone with a known Death Eater, and then you accept a drink from him without so much as a second thought?"

Neither Auror made a sound.

There was a long pause as Moody looked them over with his magical eye, the vein above it twitching in what Tonks could only assume was a combination of disappointment, and anger. "You're off duty for the remainder of the week. Both of you."

Tonks nodded, no use arguing the point when she knew she had made a terrible mistake. "I don't want to hear about any more missions like this." Moody's tone was chilling. "Nor do I want the two of you working together. Not for a while, at least." Again she nodded. "Seems both of you have forgot a few basics of the job. You're next few assignments will be routine until I'm certain you won't disregard your training again." Tonks caught Zach's eyes. He looked just as guilty as she felt. "Now, missy," Moody's voice softened every so slightly, "get dressed and have a healer look at those wounds."

Once Moody had_ Disapparated_, Tonks flopped backwards onto the bed and let out the breath she had been holding. "Bloody hell," she mumbled.

Zach stood and walked to the pile of clothes on the other side of the room. "You're going to tell me what really happened, no?" he said, glancing at her over his shoulder. "Because I know you left out a few things." His Spanish accent was thick, but his voice was full of concern.

Tonks slowly sat back up, unable to look him in the eye. "So I left a few things out? I didn't want to get into more trouble with Moody." She walked to the wardrobe and grabbed a robe. With her back to him she slipped it on and let the towel fall to the floor. "It isn't what you think."

"It isn't? Then explain to me why a fully clothed woman would return home with only her boots and a coat." He emphasized this by picking up the discarded items. "Why would she rush to the bath before making sure her friends knew she was all right? Why would she have bruises all over her and say that it was just a little struggle?"

She looked up at him slowly, feeling humiliated. "He tried to…er…when I woke up I was…my clothes were all on the floor and he was…" It was all she could do to hold back the tears.

Zach's eyes went wide. "Do you mean that he…that he…"

"No, no. I don't think so."

"You don't _think_ so? Dora!"

"I woke up in time. He hadn't…I don't feel like he did anything." Zach gave her a stern, angry look. "I think I would know if he had done anything," she said assuredly.

"You must go to a healer," he stated matter-of-factly. "Immediately."

"No. I just need…"

"Basta!" he commanded. "No arguments, or do I have to get Remus to drag you to one?"

She pursed her lips. "Listen, if I promise to go to a healer, will you promise not to tell Remus anything about this?" Zach looked at her questioningly. "Don't tell him. Please, Zach. He'll go insane if he finds out about this."

"I do not like guarding secrets. Besides, he should know."

"I know, but please…you know how he gets. I didn't tell him I had been given this assignment for that very reason. He won't be home for another few days anyway."

Zach ran a hand though his long, dark hair. "Fine. I will not say anything, but I doubt my silence will be of any help."

"Why's that?"

"Because he knows you too well. From what I know about werewolves, he's going to know that another man has laid hands upon his wife."

She took a deep breath. "Let me worry about that. Just…don't say anything to him if he asks."

Placing a hand on her shoulder, he said, "I'm not going to lie for you. I will not offer up any information on my own, but if he asks me, Dora, I cannot…I will not lie."

"Fair enough. I'll just have to make sure he has no reason to ask you."

Zach cocked his eyebrows again. "You sure about this?"

"Yes."

"Is there nothing I can get for you right now? No potion? Food?"

She collapsed onto the bed, slouching forward, resting her elbows on her knees. "No, I'll see the healer tomorrow after I get some rest. I promise. And I'm really not in the mood to eat anything."

"Then I'll leave you to it," he said before gently kissing her once on each cheek. He smiled reassuringly when he broke away, and then gave her a final supportive hug before _Disapparating._

Finally alone in the room, Tonks curled herself up into a tight ball in the middle of the bed and cried herself to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

_AN: Thanks to those of you who left reviews. I hope the fic lives up to whatever expectations you may have at this point. And I hope this chapter provides for some comfort before I go and totally mess up Remus' and Tonks' lives. Thanks to Pel and Gryff for the beta. Without you, Pel, Remus wouldn't have a job! LOL! And I'm so sorry for the monster paragraph of chapter one. I have tried and tried to fix it and I just can't figure out what is going wrong. If you have a suggestion for technical help, contack me at alphielj at yahoo dot com._

Chapter Two 13 Feb. 8:51 pm 

They were yelling again. Remus didn't like eavesdropping, especially on personal conversations like this, but how could he not listen. It was quite difficult to miss, what with their voices echoing out into the hall for everyone to hear. Every now and then the sound would soften and Remus would hold his breath in the hope that their tempers would settle down. That's what usually would happen. Tonight, however, was to be the turning point. There would be no calm moments, just yelling.

Then, rather abruptly, it just stopped. Remus sat up straight in his chair and turned toward the door on his left. It opened and a lovely, dark haired woman stepped out. Her face was red with anger, and streaked with tears. She looked down at Remus in disgust, wiped her face, and walked away without so much as a single word. This didn't surprise Remus at all. She had made her feelings toward him very clear upon their first meeting. It seemed to Remus that this was to be their last meeting. He expelled the breath he had been holding and prepared his thoughts for the job at hand.

It was silly, really, to even assume there was a way to prepare for such things. Every situation was different. There was no standard set of guidelines to follow. All he had to go on was pure instinct and intuition at times like this. Some cases were easier to deal with, while others were more challenging. It seemed to Remus that this one was going to fall into the latter category.

It wasn't as if Remus had a very pleasant job, even on the best of days. What could be pleasant about helping someone come to terms with lycanthropy? Where is there happiness in explaining to someone that a werewolf had bitten him and his life would be changed forever? Friends and family and everything they had come to rely on in their past life may well be gone. There wasn't any pleasure to be had in that. Satisfaction came from time to time with the rare individual who actually managed to transition without upsetting life too terribly. However, cases like that didn't come along too often. Besides, every case was difficult and heartbreaking in its own way.

Shortly after the war, the Ministry of Magic approached Remus about a position with the Werewolf Registry. They needed someone who could help better prepare victims of lycanthropy for their new life. Remus was skeptical at first, and rightly so! The Ministry had never been fair in their dealings with werewolves. As proof that they were sincere, the Ministry promised to make some reforms to the laws, considering how many good wizards had been infected by Greyback or another feral werewolf during the war. Remus pointed out to them that they managed to neglect a fair number of good wizards who were infected _before_ the war, but he did not belabor the point. It wasn't everything, but for him, the fact that they rescinded the employment laws pertaining to werewolves was at least a start.

He accepted their offer, as well as the much needed salary. Now it was almost a year to the day of the start of his employment at the Registry, helping individuals come to terms with life following a werewolf bite. It was vital work, but nothing could have prepared him for his first case. A child, not even old enough to read, was among the bitten. Remus saw himself in the little boy and vowed then and there to do everything in his power to make things right for his kind. There had been close calls, and even some suicides along the way, but so far everyone he worked with was managing as best they could.

Nearly all of his cases were witches or wizards who had been bitten during the war. There were two cases, however, of recent attacks that Remus had taken under his wing. One of the victims of the ferals had refused Ministry help from the start. With his inability to adapt to his new life, he had bitten two other wizards. The incidents took place several months ago and Remus was hoping there wouldn't be another attack for a long time. Much to his dismay, he was wrong. During the last full moon, not two weeks ago, the same werewolf bit another wizard.

Andrew McCollum was a young, talented, and very handsome wizard from the south who had a promising career ahead of him as a fine jeweler. His stunning wife, Helene, was a seamstress, and together they planned to open a shop in Diagon Alley. At least, that had been the plan until Andrew ended up in St. Mungo's being treated for a werewolf bite.

When Remus first met Helene, she made it very clear that she didn't approve of werewolves, regardless of the situation. A werewolf had killed her grandfather when she was just a little girl, and she had never forgiven or forgotten the damage done to her family. Now, due to her husband's condition, she was faced with spending life along side the very thing she despised. Her prejudice wouldn't allow her to over look the fact that this wasn't Andrew's fault. And so the fighting began.

By law, Andrew had to remain in St. Mungo's until the eve of his first full moon for observation and treatment. It had been two weeks since his injury, and Helene had visited only three times. Today was her fourth, and obviously final visit. She arrived with divorce papers, which Andrew refused to sign. She laughed at him, and pointed out how their marriage wouldn't even be recognized as legal any way. For some reason, she thought she was being kind by offering him some closure. He begged and pleaded with her to wait and see how things would turn out, but she refused.

Now, Remus was left with the task of helping Andrew adjust not only to life as a werewolf, but also to life without the support of his wife. Giving a light rap on the door, Remus waited until a voice invited him in.

Andrew was sitting by the window looking down at a roll of parchment. His skin was pale and his face nearly emotionless. "How much did you hear?" he asked without even looking up at Remus.

"Enough," Remus said, quietly.

"Then you know," Andrew replied, holding up the parchment.

Remus nodded.

"Three years of marriage…two years of being together before that. Five years of my life, and for what? There was a war on, and we struggled through. There were deaths – family…friends – and we struggled through! Our shop, something we both fought long and hard for, was set to open next month. And now…she wants a divorce." The pain was evident in his voice as well as on his face now.

"I'm so sorry, Andrew," Remus said honestly. "I've seen this happen before. Unfortunately, some people just can't handle the changes life throws at them."

Andrew glared at him. "CHANGES! What about me? What if I can't handle the changes? What if _I _want out? My God! How much is one man supposed to take?" Tears swelled up in his eyes. "I love her! I _need_ her, now more than ever! And she doesn't want me."

Remus pursed his lips, watching the man in front of him crumble. There had been other cases where members of the victim's family had turned away, but for some reason this case affected Remus more than any others. This time it was the wife who abandoned the husband. It was a situation Remus had feared for himself many times over the last two years. Now, as he watched Andrew face the reality of losing the person he most needed, Remus couldn't help but wonder how he would react were he placed in a similar situation.

A beautiful, heart shaped face came into his mind. Tonks, with her bright smile and dancing eyes, had been his anchor through some of the worst moments in his life. Her zest for life consumed him, letting him draw from her strength. It was difficult to imagine life with out her. For a brief moment, standing in St. Mungo's, Remus found himself catching a glimpse of what it would feel like to be left alone without her.

"Andrew, is there anything I can do?" he offered, even though he already knew the answer.

But Andrew didn't answer. He kept his eyes focused on the parchment in front of him. "Do you know what she said? She said she wants a family, and thati why she is divorcing me. A FAMILY!" he shouted, pounding his fist on the table. "Never, in all her life has Helene wanted a child! She told me when we first started dating that she would never have children. It would ruin her figure!" He was shouting now. "I married her anyway. I accepted her! I loved her, in spite of her vanity. And now she's using that against me."

Remus winced at the words, but the claims Helene made were valid. Andrew would never be able to have a child with Helene, or any other human woman, now that he was a werewolf. It was impossible. Lycanthropy tainted the blood just enough to make a pregnancy with a human unviable. Conception was possible, but upon the first full moon, the mother would become violently ill and the fetus would be lost.

"Never…in all my life…" Andrew muttered, reading over the words on the parchment. "I suppose it's useless to try to prove that she has no desire to become a mother. They aren't likely to take the word of a werewolf over that of a…human," he faltered, looking up at Remus.

"I don't see how you can prove she isn't telling the truth here." Remus sat down and began reading over the parchment.

"Why won't she just admit that looking at me sickens her? Wouldn't that be easier?"

Remus didn't know what to say to calm the young man's anger.

"She's forcing me to sign it, you know. She says if I don't, she'll take it to the Ministry." He frowned as if he had tasted something rotten. "They'll nullify the marriage if I don't officially divorce her, won't they?"

Remus sighed and glanced down at the parchment, "Yes, that's what this says."

"Does this always happen? Divorce, I mean."

"No. Sometimes a spouse just leaves. Other times, a person in your situation will demand it. And then there are those individuals who refuse to leave the person they love for any reason."

"They're lucky then." Andrew said. "Doesn't the Ministry force them to…end it?"

Shaking his head, Remus said, "Not yet, no. If a spouse wants a divorce, then they are entitled to it, based on the Marriage Law of 1473."

"So what Helene is doing is totally legal?"

"I'm afraid so."

Andrew rubbed his watery eyes and breathed heavily. "I should hate her for this, but - "

"But you love her," Remus finished.

"Yes," he whispered through tears.

They sat in silence for a few minutes until Andrew was able to pull himself together. "Are you married?" he asked.

Remus sat back slowly and wet his lips. "According to the Ministry of Magic, no, I'm not. But I love someone very much, and I have chosen to spend my life with her regardless of what the laws say. For all intents and purposes, she is my wife."

"You're one of the lucky ones, huh?"

Remus smiled. "I consider myself extraordinarily lucky." He sat forward again, looking Andrew in the eyes. "I have lived with this curse for a very long time, Andrew. In recent years I have seen great changes happen – changes I never thought possible. I know that you have a difficult time in front of you, but I can assure you that there is hope. Life will go on, and you will survive this. As your friend, I will help you the best I can."

Andrew thought for a moment. "Maybe some day they'll change the marriage laws."

"I hope they do."

"And maybe some day, Helene…will have a change of heart."

Remus held back from any comment. From what Remus had seen over the last two weeks, Andrew was a rather nice young man. It seemed incomprehensible that he would have such deep feelings for a woman who would hurt him like this. It was normal for people to be afraid of the unknown, and adjusting to living with lycanthropy was certainly something to fear, but Helene seemed unwilling to even consider the possibility. Her prejudices against werewolves were unmovable, regardless of what she knew about her husband. Andrew deserved better than this – better than her. Yet, he still loved her. Remus hoped that some day Andrew would be able to move on and resume his life with some normalcy.

Reluctantly, Andrew signed the parchment and gave it to Remus to take to the Ministry. Begging Remus to leave him alone for a while, he promised to try to get some sleep. Remus knew Andrew would spend the rest of the night sitting by the window and feeling angry at the hand life had dealt him. Who could blame him? Yet Remus did as he was asked and left Andrew alone. He informed the staff of St. Mungo's to keep an eye on their patient, just in case he tried something foolish, but Remus had an inexplicable feeling that Andrew would be fine.

He checked his watch with only one thought in his head. _I miss Tonks. _It was nearly ten o'clock, rather early by Tonks' schedule. She was a night owl, and Remus knew it better than anyone. Early morning assignments were not her cup of tea, unlike Remus who would rather not waste the day having a lie in. It was one of the many differences between them that made life in the Lupin home interesting.

Remus made his way outside before deciding where he should go next. He wasn't scheduled to return home for another few weeks. Andrew had yet to be introduced to Wolfsbane Potion, let alone experience an actual transformation. Part of Remus' duty was to make sure he had a safe place to transform and help him with any unanswered questions. Usually, Remus stayed near by in case the individual needed help during the night. However, seeing as how Andrew asked for some time alone, Remus was left with a night free from supervision duty.

_And it's Valentine's Day. Almost._

He needed to see her. After witnessing the fight between Andrew and his wife, Remus desperately needed to hold Tonks in his arms and tell her how much he loved her. They didn't see each other much due to their work schedules, and Remus missed her dearly. He had the whole night to do as he pleased, and it would please him greatly to spend it with her.

Glancing around at the few Muggles nearby, Remus rounded a corner and headed down the alley to where it was virtually deserted. A small pop sounded and he found himself in the dark living room of the home he shared with Tonks. He frowned, expecting to find her here, stewing over some project for work. He could tell that she had been working at the kitchen table at some point due to the fact that there were several bits of parchment strewn about it. The faint smell of snuffed candles lingered in the air. She had to be near by. He listened closely for any sound that might lead him to where she was. Through the silence he heard a soft sigh coming from the bedroom.

Is she asleep? 

The idea was absurd. Tonks never went to bed this early unless she was completely exhausted. _She must have had a hard day._ Treading softly across the wooden floor, Remus peaked into the bedroom at the lovely figure curled up in the middle of the bed. Sure enough, she was sound asleep.

Remus smirked and he decided he would just have to wake her up. She couldn't have been asleep for long. Besides, they hadn't seen each other in over a week. She would never forgive him if he didn't use this time wisely. Making his way to the bed, he sat down beside her, careful not to disturb her too much. He wanted to wake her up properly.

Remus gently ran his fingers through the brown fringe that fell loosely over her face. She wasn't morphed, which Remus found delightful. She could usually hold a shape when she slept. There were times, however, when she just didn't care. Remus loved her any way she looked, but he especially adored her true self. It was a face that she allowed few people to see, and Remus considered it endearing that she felt comfortable enough around him to be her natural self.

Gently, he kissed the side of her jaw close to her ear. Her skin was warm under his lips. An ear lobe peeked at him through the dusting of hair around her shoulder. Knowing full well that Tonks had sensitive ears, Remus brushed the hair aside and nibbled at her ear lobe playfully. His hand found it's way down her side to the soft curve of her hip. With a loving pull, he lowered his body to hers and fitted her against his side.

Suddenly, Tonks yelped and jumped away from Remus as if she had been burnt. Her eyes, now fully open, stared at him in utter terror. She clutched the blanket tightly in her fists. Remus blinked in confusion, feeling a bit rejected.

"What's wrong?"

Tonks panted slightly. "Remus. I thought…I didn't…Bloody hell you scared me."

"Are you alright?" he asked, worried that something was dreadfully wrong.

"I just…" she rubbed at her eyes, getting hold of her breath. "Bad dream. You startled me, is all."

"A nightmare?"

She nodded. "I'm sorry. I just…" she sighed and looked up at him with a puzzled face. "What are you doing here, anyway?"

Now Remus really felt unwelcome. "I had an evening to myself and wanted to spend it with you. I didn't think that would be a problem."

"Of course it isn't." She smiled, relaxing a bit. "I didn't mean that the way it sounded, Remus. You know I want to be with you."

"All evidence to the contrary," he teased.

She smirked at him. "It was a dream, really, and I wasn't expecting you to be home for a while yet. Considering those facts, you're lucky I didn't hex you into the middle of next week for being woken up like that." She took his hand in hers.

"I'm sorry that I frightened you. That wasn't my intention at all."

"No? And what was your intention?"

"I had thought that I would make passionate love to you, but considering how jumpy you are –"

"Remus," she smiled, tugging at his arm.

"I'm not sure I should even kiss you," he said, stretching out beside her.

"I'm wide awake now."

"Yes, but the mood has been totally spoilt," he replied, fighting back a grin.

She touched the tip of his nose with hers. "Then let's fix that." She tilted her mouth up to his, waiting for him to kiss her.

Whispering against her lips, he asked, "Do I have your permission now?"

She slumped back against the bed in frustration. "Remus. I'm sorry I jumped when you kissed me, but I wasn't expecting you and I –"

Shutting her up, Remus covered her mouth with his. He took in the texture of her lips and the taste of her breath. He could feel that she wanted more than just the kiss, but he held back. He kissed her slowly, savoring the intimate touch of her mouth against his. She wrapped her arms around him and invited him to deepen the kiss. He did. His senses were heightened, taking in the feel of her…the taste…the smell…

And then he stopped.

Something was different.

Burying his face in her neck, he inhaled the unusual scent that took him by surprise. He tried again, but still found the fragrance foreign. Whatever it was, it wasn't _Tonks_. At least, it wasn't the Tonks he knew. Something clicked in his brain. The way she jumped when he touched her…the change in her scent…

"Remus?"

Slowly he pushed himself up so he could look down at her. "When was our first kiss?" he asked in an emotionless voice.

"What?"

"Our first kiss. When was it?" He narrowed his eyes at her.

She looked totally stunned. "Why are you asking me this?"

Growing suspicious, Remus prodded her to just answer the question.

She gasped. "You think I'm a Death Eater?"

He raised his eyebrows. "Can you answer the question?"

"Of course I can." She sat up, rolling her eyes at him as she did. "But see, it's kind of a tricky question, depending on what you consider our first kiss."

"How can that be tricky?" He asked, sitting up next to her.

"Because, do you count our almost kiss as the first kiss, or are you talking about the night you left for Greyback?"

Remus frowned, "What's an almost kiss?"

"We _kissed_, but it wasn't really a kiss. You know, at St. Mungo's."

Remus thought for a moment until the memory slammed into his mind plain as day. He had been thinking that the rather emotional scene before he left to join the feral werewolves was when they had first kissed, but Tonks had pointed out another option. After they followed Sirius to the Department of Mysteries, after Sirius was killed, they had very nearly kissed each other.

"You count that as our first kiss?" he asked.

"Well, our lips did touch, but it wasn't a real snog or anything. Not like…well…when you kissed me before you left for Greyback."

"Hang on. When _I _kissed _you_? I think it was the other way a round."

"No, I kissed back, but you most certainly were the one who initiated the kiss." Before Remus could argue the point any further, she took his face in her hands and looked him directly in the eyes. "Are you at least satisfied now that I am who I say I am?"

Remus blinked. "Yes. But I still say you kissed me first."

Tonks laughed lightly. "Oh, Remus, why would you even think I was lying to you? Did you really believe I was a spy or something?"

"I had a good reason to be suspicious. You…you're different."

"How so?"

"Well, you er…" He struggled with the phrase, hating how animalistic it made him sound. "You smell different."

"Oh," she said, biting at her lip. "It's a new soap."

Remus nearly laughed at loud at her. "Soap? Dearest, it's more than soap, and you know it." She looked away from him, a flush rising on her face. "What is it? What happened?" he asked, concerned.

"I…fell. Tripped, really. Into a stink bush."

Remus smirked and leaned forward to smell her hair again. "You don't smell like a stink bush."

"That's because I washed it off. It was horrid – rotten. I couldn't stand my own smell."

"What did you use?" asked Remus, still not convinced this was the whole truth.

"_Wash Away Blast_. It's a new Weasley product. Zach bought it for me."

"Zach," he said with a groan. Tonks was one of the only female Aurors in her unit at the time being, so naturally most of her co-workers were men. That fact never bothered Remus at all until the day he met one Anaxagoras Garcia, a transfer from Spain. He and Tonks had a great deal in common with each other and became fast friends. Both were rather young for Aurors, both free spirited, and both had dreadfully horrific first names that they despised. It wasn't long before she started calling him "Zach" and he took up calling her "Dora". It made Remus cringe every time he heard it.

"Oh come on, Zach's not allowed to give me soap now?" Tonks quarried when Remus frowned again.

"The idea of you bathing with a gift Garcia gave you isn't something I'm rather fond of."

"Soap, Remus! It's not as if he gave me a lover's gift!" Now she was very nearly laughing at him. Remus, naturally, didn't find the situation funny in the least. "He was just trying to help me out. Trust me, you wouldn't have liked the way I smelled."

"Well, it worked."

"What did?"

"The soap. You defiantly smell…clean."

"As opposed to smelling…?"

"Like you," Remus finished for her. "You don't smell like you." That wasn't the only problem with her new scent, but Remus wasn't sure how he could explain the rest of it. He wasn't even sure he should try.

"You want me to put some perfume on? Or one of my old robes?"

"No, that's not necessary. I just have to learn this new smell." He offered her a smile hoping that she would believe him.

"Hum," she hummed thoughtfully, laying down and signaling for him to do the same. "You sure that's all? I smell funny and it bothers you. That's it?"

He lowered himself on to his side, resting his head on his hand so he could look down at her. "No, that's not it." She snuggled close to him, waiting for him to continue. "I had a bit of a rough night tonight. I suppose I was taking some of it out on you."

"What happened?" she asked, resting her arm over his hip.

"The man I'm working with right now – Andrew – his wife left him."

"Oh no!" she gasped.

"She filed for divorce claiming she wanted children, and since Andrew could no longer give her any…"

"That poor man."

"What's even worse is that Andrew says she never wanted children. She's only using it now as an excuse to get a divorce as quickly as possible."

"Oh God. The nerve of some people."

Remus looked into her brown eyes, stroking the side of her face lovingly. "It made me think how lucky I am to have you."

"Damn right," she said, kissing him.

Remus pulled her to him and kissed her deeply. He couldn't deny that the difference in her scent was affecting him. The closer he got to her, the worse it was. Not only had she managed to get the smell of the stink bush out, but she had also managed to wash away any lingering scent of Remus. It was almost as if he had never touched Tonks, let alone made love to her. He didn't like it, and he intended to correct the situation.

"I love you," he whispered in her ear.

"I love _you_," she returned, arching against him. "And you know that I will never leave you."

He smiled and kissed her deeply, pressing against her body needfully. In his heart, he knew that she loved him, but his mind often played tricks on him. Like today, his mind was running on over time where Tonks was concerned. The idea that she could wash away any trace of him from her life coupled with what he witnessed at the hospital was enough to cause him concern. Tonks was so young and full of life. Yet for some reason that left Remus baffled, she fell in love with him.

It made him worry. Even now, after two years of being together, Remus still had a feeling that a storm was brewing. The fear of that storm was always present in his mind, nagging him when he would least expect it. She could leave him. There was nothing legally binding her to him or vice versa. There were only heart-felt promises spoken between lovers.

That's what they were right now – lovers. Their bodies moved together as one, unified in passion. Remus made a point to take things slowly, noticing that she was still a bit on edge from earlier. He reveled in the sensation of her hands on him and returned the pleasure gladly. When their bodies were spent of all energy, Remus cradled Tonks against his chest, wrapping his arms around her lovingly. Their breathing began to even out, and soon they drifted off into a peaceful slumber, basking in the calm before the storm.

_AN2: Um…yes…there is an outtake for this ending. I wouldn't be me if I didn't write out takes. Leave a review with your e-mail and I'll send it to you. I've been told that it's rather…er…hot. Tempted? I thought you might be. _


	3. Chapter 3

_AN: Again I offer thanks to the betas – Durayan, Pelirroja, and Gryffinjack. _

_For anyone wanting to read the outtake mentioned at the end of chapter two, you can find it at the Wolf and Lady LJ. http/community. 3 _

14 Feb, 7:48 am

_"I like it rough, baby!"_

_The voice was distant in her mind._

_Hands were running through her hair._

_"It's time to join the party!"_

_Her legs were pushed apart._

_"Oh no you don't!" _

_The voice was stern and gruff._

_A mouth pressed against her neck._

_"I can't wait to get inside you!"_

Tonks, gasping for breath, opened her eyes. She looked into the face above her expecting to see malicious intent. Instead, she saw worry and fear. It wasn't Darrius LaMont's face that returned her gaze, but rather Remus Lupin's. She sighed in relief.

"Dearest, are you all right?"

"Yes," she breathed through another sigh.

"That's twice now that you startled when I kissed you. Nym, are you sure – "

"I'm fine. I've just had a rough week."

He frowned at her. "Really, Remus," she said, knowing that look all too well. "I'll be fine." To offer reassurance, she kissed him purposefully. There was no way she was going to allow the incident with Darrius to ruin what little time she had this morning with Remus. "How long do you have?" she asked, knowing that he would have to get back to hospital soon.

"Not long," he said, rolling onto his back, pulling her on top of him. "An hour maybe."

She flattened her hand against his chest, stroking the muscles she found. "There is a lot we can do in an hour."

"Indeed. Take a shower. Get dressed. Eat breakfast." He did little to hide the sarcasm.

Playfully, she said, "I like the shower idea. Mind if I join you?"

His eyebrows shot up, full of intrigue. "Why would I mind?"

She leaned up ever so slightly and planted a chaste kiss on his lips. When she tried to break away, Remus took hold of her hand, keeping her in place. The kiss grew deeper and more powerful. The emotion Remus could express in one kiss always left Tonks breathless.

"I love it when the moon is new," she sighed blissfully when the kiss ended.

Remus laughed. "And why is that?"

"Because you are so…tender. I can always tell what phase the moon is in by the way you touch me." His body stiffened slightly, but Tonks paid it no attention. Instead, she kissed his chest and snuggled closer to him.

"Do you mean that?" he asked quietly after a few seconds.

"Um hum," she hummed against his skin, still oblivious to the scowl Remus was making.

"Then what you're saying is that close to the full moon I'm not so tender?" Remus asked, his hand gently stroking her back.

"You are a bit more wild then, yeah," she confirmed, with a waggle of her eyebrows.

"Have I ever hurt you?" Remus asked in a voice very unlike his own.

Tonks rose up to smile at him, only to find him looking concerned and worried. "What's that face for?"

"I just want to know if I've ever hurt you. You said I was wilder close to the full moon. I honestly wasn't aware I treated you differently depending on the phase of the moon."

"Oh, Remus," she smiled. "It isn't like that, so stop frowning at me. If you ever did something that I didn't like, I would make certain you knew about it."

"But you don't like the way I touch you close to a full moon."

"I never said _that_. I only said it's _different_." Remus looked away, obviously still worried. She rolled her eyes and sat up farther. "Remus Lupin, you look at me right now." He did, but it was reluctantly. "I love you any way I can get you, and you know it. I was only pointing out that when the moon is new you take things a bit more slowly. You're almost meticulous about it. And right now, after the week I've had, that's exactly what I wanted and needed."

Remus held her gaze. She could tell he wasn't quite convinced. "There are other times when I enjoy your more wild side, as well," she offered. "You have never done anything to scare me or hurt me or whatever else you might be thinking. So, stop worrying about it."

She gave him a quick kiss and waited for him to relax. His arms had grown very tense during her explanation. His eyes darted down to look at the hand he was holding and then back up to her face. The troubled look he gave her was evidence enough that something was still wrong.

"Remus, come on. Don't spoil what little time we have together this morning by fretting about some stupid comment of mine."

"It's not that," he said.

"Then what, because I'd really like you to forget I even said anything."

"Where's your ring?" he asked, taking Tonks totally by surprise.

"My ring?" She looked down at her left hand, the one he was holding. "Bollocks!" she said, snatching her hand away from his.

He was right. She wasn't wearing her ring. Since they weren't officially married, it couldn't be called a wedding ring, but that's essentially what it was. Remus had given it to her last Christmas after a fight they had over the status of their relationship. Shortly after moving in together, Tonks had described Remus as her "husband" to a witch in one of the shops. The witch nastily commented on how she didn't quite believe it as Tonks wasn't wearing a ring and, therefore, must not be in a very committed relationship. It had lead to a fight between them – a fight which they had managed to avoid up until then.

Tonks felt it would be totally acceptable for them to have some sort of ceremony, making things official between them. She even offered to have a Muggle wedding. After all, Tonks' father was Muggleborn, as was Remus' mother. However, Remus pointed out that Muggles required blood tests, and surely even a Muggle doctor would notice something odd in the blood of a metamorph and a werewolf. The idea of a private ceremony was insulting to Remus. To him, it would be as if they were admitting that their relationship wasn't worthy of a "real" marriage. Besides, everyone who was close to them already accepted their status as a couple. Did they really need a piece of parchment to prove they loved each other?

The whole situation left Tonks rather upset, both with the Ministry of Magic and with Remus. Every now and then she would sarcastically comment on it, hoping to goad Remus into changing his mind. Sometimes he would laugh, sometimes he would ignore her, and sometimes they would quarrel a bit. Eventually Tonks let it go, but the hope of marriage never left her.

And then Christmas came. They spent the day at the Burrow with the whole Weasley clan. When it came time to open gifts, Remus quietly slipped a small jewelry box into her hand saying, "I think it's time you had one of these." She took it from him in almost reverence. Time froze as she simply stared at him in surprise. Everyone in the room stopped to look at her with knowing smiles.

_"Open it," Remus prodded._

_Inside she found a white gold band with three tiny pink diamonds. She couldn't speak. Tears filled her eyes._

_"One for the past, the present, and the future," Remus said, his voice full of emotion. He added a soft, "I love you," as he took the ring out of the box and slipped it on her finger. "Now you can flash that at any silly shop keeper who doesn't believe you're in a committed relationship."_

She flung her arms around him and kissed him deeply, right there in front of everyone, swearing to never take it off. And now…this morning…Remus discovered it gone from her finger. No wonder Remus looked so distraught.

"I took it off," she tried to cover, "when I fell in the stink bush."

"You took it off _before_ you fell?" he asked.

She thought for a moment. It didn't make much sense to take off a ring before you fell in a bush, especially if you didn't know you were going to fall. "After. When I was cleaning up."

Remus cocked an eyebrow at her. "You wanted to clean everything but your ring?"

"Well, I was afraid it would…er…fall off in the shower." Not a good cover and she new it.

"Nym, how would a ring made to fit your finger simply fall off in the shower?"

Instead of giving him an answer, which she didn't have, she simply smiled and said, "Why don't I just go get the ring." She hopped out of the bed, picked up the ring from the chest of drawers, and quickly snuggled back under the covers next to Remus. "See, I didn't lose it. It was here the whole time."

"I didn't think you'd lost it. I just wanted to know why you weren't wearing it." He paused, waiting for a better explanation. " Dearest, I know you didn't fall in a stink bush. My nose is harder to fool than that. I assume it was something embarrassing that you don't want me to know about, which I suppose I can understand - "

"Remus - "

"But please don't tell me you took your ring off for an equally silly reason. Unless…you really think I'm that dense."

"I don't think you're dense."

"Then how about we try the truth."

With a heavy sigh, Tonks fell back against the bed. She whimpered like a child being forced to do something they really didn't want to do. "I'll tell you, but you've got to promise me you won't go ballistic."

"Oh, that's very comforting," Remus said, rolling onto his side to look at her.

"It was for an assignment. I pretended to flirt with a man so I could get information from him. I can't very well flirt with someone while wearing a wedding ring, now can I?"

"And the whole thing with the soap?"

"Well, it was a very stinky assignment. Smoke and alcohol, not to mention that this bloke…" she stopped and considered her word choice here. "He came on to me. You know."

"Did you get the information you needed?"

"No," Tonks admitted, begrudgingly. "It was a total bust."

"So then, why didn't you want me to know about this?"

"Because I didn't want you to get angry. You have a tendency to be very…possessive about me," she said, hesitantly. "Look at the way you are about Zach, and he's just a friend. I can only imagine how crazy you would get if I told you I was actually going to willingly flirt with another man."

"Oh, I don't know about that. If it was an assignment…"

"He was a young man, Remus. Younger than you. And we were in one of those pubs with the loud music that gets you all worked up."

Remus pursed his lips.

"I know you better than you think I do. Regardless of how much I love you, you still think you're too old for me."

Remus smirked. "You're right."

Tonks looked a bit stunned. "I am?"

"Yes. I wish I could let it go. But I think I will always hold some sort of a fear that one of these days you will realize who you have attached yourself to and…you'll want out."

Tonks rolled to face him, sliding one of her legs between his, fitting their bodies together rather intimately. "And I guess it doesn't help much when I forget to put my ring back on after assignments, huh?"

His fingers stroked her hair. "Just promise me that next time you'll magic the ring to look different, rather than taking it off entirely."

She kissed him meaningfully. "Promise." The kiss deepened as arms and legs intertwined.

"I thought you were going to take a shower?" she panted out as Remus began kissing a path down her neck.

"I'd rather do this instead."

9:04 am that same morning

Standing in the kitchen wearing nothing but her bathrobe, Tonks quickly buttered some toast. "When do you think you'll get away again?" she called out to Remus, who was busy getting dressed in the bedroom.

"Not for at least a week. Full moon is the first. I still need to make sure Andrew has a place to transform, not to mention a supplier for his potion," Remus said, walking up to the counter and fixing them both a cup of coffee.

"There's no full moon in February?"

"No, and we have a Blue Moon in March. Another wonderful turn of events for Andrew," he said sarcastically, crunching into his toast. "Thanks for this."

Living with a werewolf, Tonks had learned very quickly about the phases of the moon and all the terminology that went with it. A blue moon meant that there would be two full moons in one month. For some reason, the second transformation in a month was more painful and difficult to get through than the first. It usually only happened once a year, and this year it was going to be in March.

"Did you tell him about the blue moon?"

"Whom are you talking about?" Remus said after swallowing down his bite.

"The new guy. The one you're working with."

"Andrew?"

"Yeah. Did you tell him about the blue moon?"

"Yes I did, on my first visit with him. His wife asked how long they had until the next full moon and I explained that there wouldn't be one until March. Why?" He took another bite of his toast sending crumbs falling down his front.

Tonks brushed him clean. "I dunno. I guess if it were me…if I had just been told that I was bitten by a werewolf…"

"What?"

"Well, lycanthropy is bad enough, isn't it? But to find out right away that your first two transformations are going to be right out horrific…well…"

"Every transformation is horrific," Remus corrected.

"Yeah, but blue moons are worse, right? Maybe you should have waited to tell him about that."

Remus thought for a moment. "I was as tactful as I could be, Tonks. I found it to be important information, given the circumstances. It wasn't as if I was being rude about it."

"I didn't say you were, but I am surprised that you mentioned it so quickly. Especially since the wife was there. That might have been what got her all riled up in the first place."

The frown on Remus' face grew heavy. "I hadn't thought of it like that."

Worried that she might have said too much, Tonks took his hand and offered a final suggestion. "But you know, based on how hateful she was towards him, I doubt there was any thing you could have done to soften the blow."

Remus didn't look too convinced, but he smiled anyway. "That reminds me, I need to get some information together to take to Andrew." He kissed the tip of her nose and brushed past her.

Tonks sipped her coffee and watched Remus gather up a few of his things. Books were always a favorite of Remus', and he had more books on lycanthropy than anyone should be allowed to have - werewolf or wizard. He flipped through a few, making odd faces and mumbling to himself about the content. Tonks made out phrases like, "Oh, not yet. Maybe next month," and "Where was that one with the diagrams?" She smiled at his fastidiousness and held back a laugh.

The sound of a knock at the door broke the moment for both of them. "I'll get it," she said, putting down her coffee. "You go on talking to yourself." Remus didn't seem to hear her last comment.

To her surprise, Anaxagoras Garcia stood in the hall holding a lovely bouquet of fresh flowers. "Good morning," he chimed, brightly.

She offered him a smile. "What are you doing here?"

"I knew you'd be alone for Valentine's Day and thought that these might help ease the loneliness."

"Oh, Zach" she sighed, touched by his thoughtfulness. "You didn't have to do that."

"De nada Every beautiful woman should have flowers given to her on a day like this. Besides, I needed an excuse to come and see you. I have missed you."

"Thank you," she said, taking the flowers from his out stretched hand. "But you see, I'm not really…alone." She opened the door enough so Zach could see Remus on the far said of the room. Looking over her shoulder at Remus, she could tell that he wasn't too pleased to see Zach, or the flowers, at the door.

"Mr. Lupin. Remus," Zach faltered. "I did not know you would be home." Very softly, just loud enough so Tonks could hear, he added, "I'm sorry. I just wanted to check on you."

"It's all right."

"How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine."

"You are okay then?"

"Yes."

"You saw the healer?"

She nodded, "Bruises all patched up."

Even more softly, Zach asked, "And did you tell him?" His eyes darted up to look Remus.

"I told him enough."

"I already worry," he whispered. "Since it makes almost two weeks that I last saw you…"

Tonks felt a hand on her shoulder. "What are you two whispering about?" Remus asked from behind her.

"Oh, just…work. Zach and I have been on different assignments, so we haven't seen much of each other."

"I see," Remus said, looking a bit skeptical. "Those are lovely flowers."

Zach gave a genuine smile. "I did not realize you would be home today. I should not have intruded."

"It's all right. You didn't know," Tonks said, hoping to smooth the tension she was feeling from Remus. "But Remus has to leave soon, so if you wouldn't mind…?" She left off the end of her sentence, hoping Zach would take the cue.

"Not at all. I'll leave you two alone. Adios Dora – Remus."

Once Tonks shut the door, Remus gave her a rather unsettling look. "Flowers?" he said questioningly. "Why would he bring you flowers?"

"He was only being nice."

"Either that or he's interested in you."

"Oh, Remus. Stop." She brushed past him and headed into the kitchen where she placed the bouquet in a vase.

"What were you two really whispering about?"

"Work, just like he said."

Remus cocked an unbelieving eyebrow at her. "I heard something about a healer."

"Yeah…er…" Tonks stammered. "This last assignment, the one that didn't go so well, I er…I got a bit banged up. Just bruises and the like."

"Are you all right?" Remus said, stepping close to her and looking her over as if to inspect her for any remaining wounds.

"I'm fine. Really. It isn't anything to get worked up over." She closed the distance between them and wrapped her arms around his waist. "Considering our activities last night and this morning, I think you would have noticed if I had been seriously injured."

She kissed him slowly, feeling the smile forming on his mouth as she did. She pulled him against her tightly, marveling at how perfectly their bodies fit against each other. Tonks was never sure if they truly did fit just right, or if she unconsciously morphed her body so it would fit against Remus. Either way, she loved being held like this.

When the kiss finally ended, Remus leaned down slightly and sighed against her neck. "I love you."

"You'd better," she teased.

"I wish I could spend all day with you today."

"I know."

She felt his hands slide down her back to her hips as he pushed away from her just enough to look into her eyes. "I'm not sure when I'll be able to get away again. The moon is waxing and Andrew still has so much to learn. I sometimes feel as if I'm racing against the clock."

"I understand, and I don't want to add stress to the situation. Just go and do what you need to do."

"But it's Valentine's Day."

"Yeah, and I got a right good Valentine this morning, or don't you remember?" She gave his bum a loving squeeze.

"How could I forget?" He kissed her again, slowly, as if trying to lock the feel of her lips into his memory.

"I love you," he said when they finally broke apart.

"Me, too," she smiled.

"I'll see you after the next full moon then," he added, gathering up the things he had selected to take to Andrew.

She chastely kissed him again, not wanting to drag out the inevitable. "'Till then," she sighed before he Disapperated.

_AN: A special thanks to lady tavington for allowing me to steal the idea of Tonks having a pink diamond from her. _


	4. Chapter 4

_AN: Many thanks to those who left reviews. And to Pel for the Spanish and the tapas – and to Gryff for being such a good audience. You guys ROX._

**Chapter Four**

28 Feb. 5:47 pm 

Everyone always did the same thing. When the sun set and the moon rose, they would always behave the same way. One of these days Remus was certain he would meet someone who would differ from the norm. Surely someone waited for the inevitable by sitting down. But not tonight. Andrew did the same thing every other person before him did. He paced.

Back and forth. From one end of the room to the next. Over and over. Retracing the same steps. Wearing the floor boards thin. Remus watched as Andrew paced the room like a caged animal. He would rub his hands together, crack his knuckles, make fists, but through it all he kept up the pacing. It was nervous energy coupled with the unfamiliar desire to hunt. For Remus, it was a feeling he had lived with for more than thirty years. For Andrew, it was totally foreign.

"How much longer?" Andrew asked for the third time in about as many minutes.

"We've still got about a half hour," Remus answered from his makeshift chair in the corner of the small cabin. It was a place that Andrew had visited as a child with his father. Being isolated in the forest, it was an excellent location to use as shelter during a transformation. Wards had been put in place along with silencing charms, as was usual, but all in all it was fine just as it stood.

"Half hour still? God, this is…" He exhaled loudly and ran a hand through his hair.

"How are you doing?" Remus asked.

"How do you bloody think I'm doing? I want…GOD! I want out of here! Out of this room. Out…just…out." His hands were visibly shaking now. "I can't describe it. I feel…I feel…"

'The pull of the moon," Remus finished for him. "That's what you're feeling."

"I don't care what it is. It's bloody awful!"

"I know," agreed Remus with a nod.

"And you!" Andrew pointed at Remus. "How can you sit there all calm and rational, casually making conversation? I feel as if I'm coming out of my skin and you just sit there and watch!"

"I'm feeling exactly what you are feeling," he explained, taking a mental note of the way his hands were clasping at the side of the chair, the tension in his body building. He took a steadying breath and willed himself to calm down. " I'm just more accustomed to it."

Andrew laughed a cold laugh. "I doubt I'll ever get accustomed to this. I just…" He made two fists and punched the wall of the cabin. "If I don't get out of here I'll go mad!"

Remus was on his feet in an instant. "Andrew," he said calmly, "what you're feeling is totally normal."

"Normal? This is a far cry from any normal I've ever known!"

Remus held his shoulders, trying to look him directly in the eyes. "Andrew, listen to me. This is what you wanted. This is where we agreed to come, where you wanted to come to transform. You are safe here. I know what is happening to you is incredibly frightening, but you will be fine." Andrew struggled against him, but Remus held firm. "You have to trust me. I wouldn't let you transform anywhere unsafe."

"You said…the potion…would make it…better," the young man stammered. His body was fully shaking under Remus' hands.

"The potion helps you keep your mind. It helps you understand that this urge you are feeling is not rational."

"But I still want out!"

"Yet you remain in here. You know better. You know it's safer _here_."

The two men locked eyes for what seemed like an eternity. Taking a few deep, steady breaths, Andrew began to stop the shaking in his body. The tension in his face softened. Slowly, Remus released his grip on Andrew's shoulders.

"Is it always like this?" Andrew asked quietly.

"The feelings are always the same. The urge will always be there. Like any affliction, your body will become accustomed to the sensation and your mind will adapt so that it doesn't seem as bad as this." Remus' voice dropped in intensity. "The first transformation is always the worst one."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"It's supposed to help you think logically. Our mind is the only thing we take with us when we transform. Regardless of what pain your body may feel or what shape your body takes, you are still Andrew McCollum. And when this night is over, you will still be Andrew McCollum."

"Well, the Andrew McCollum I know has never had an urge to eat raw meat!"

Remus chuckled.

"You think that's funny?" Andrew said, obviously upset. "I like my steak well done, thank you."

Crossing his arms in front of him, Remus smiled at the younger man. "I'm sorry, Andrew. You're quite right. I shouldn't be making light of the situation."

"Damn right, you shouldn't. I've never liked rare meat. All that blood gets the other food on your plate all soggy. It's disgusting."

Remus fought back another laugh.

Andrew gaped at him. "Come on, now. For the first time in my life I would really like to eat a soggy steak. Are you sure the potion is working?"

"Andrew, it's comments like those that prove the potion is working."

"Yeah?"

"Absolutely. You referred to steak instead of calling it just food…or rather the need to feed. You mentioned eating it on a plate, whereas a wolf would eat on the ground. You're thinking about consuming food the way a human would, not the way an animal would."

"And the fact that I want it raw? I don't even mean rare. I mean _raw_."

Remus nodded. "It comes with the territory."

"Not to mention the fact that I can now hear the grass growing AND," Andrew paused to give a wicked laugh. "Did you know that something as mundane as a piece of parchment has a scent? It's as if my whole body is on sensory overload!"

Remus wet his lips, thinking what to say next, but he didn't get the chance.

Andrew paced again. "Why the hell didn't we have steak for lunch today? You made me eat salad. Maybe if I had eaten meat I wouldn't feel so…"

"Trust me on this one. Regardless of what or how much you eat before a full moon, you will always feel the urge to hunt. Besides, you don't want a full stomach when you transform."

Andrew didn't seem to hear Remus. He began rubbing his hands up and down his arms, scratching at his flesh. "My skin itches."

"It's starting," Remus said coolly.

"It burns!" Andrew cried out, clawing at his chest.

"I know."

_6:42 pm the same evening_

"Are you feeling better?" Zach asked from across the table. He looked at Tonks with a worried expression as she bit into her food.

"Much better. Thanks" she said, her mouth packed full. She chewed rapidly, looking back at him. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

Zach raised his eyebrows and shook his head. "Es nada. As long as you are feeling better."

"I am. So stop looking at me like that." She shoved another bite into her mouth and looked away from Zach's concerned face. No, it wasn't really concern that she saw in him. It was more like…confusion. There was even a slight touch of revulsion once Tonks allowed herself to think about it.

For the life of her, she couldn't figure out why he was looking at her like she had snakes coming out of her ears! She was hungry, that's all. A few hours ago she didn't quite feel well and grew slightly dizzy. Once it was determined that the cause of her dizziness was the fact that she hadn't eaten anything all day, Zach insisted on taking her to dinner. She hadn't felt hungry really until she stepped into the restaurant and caught the aroma lingering in the air.

Steak. Meat. Beef.

It made her mouth water.

She couldn't wait to eat, but Zach felt the need to explain to her about the tradition surrounding the restaurant. It was certainly different from any place she had ever eaten since everything was on a bunch of individual saucer like dishes, however she was so hungry she really didn't care about the history or whatever it was Zach was trying to tell her. Something about tapas and authentic Spanish food. The only real thing she caught was that some of the food was served raw and that you ordered by the plateful.

Her Spanish was limited so she let Zach order for her, instructing him to order something with beef. She didn't want chicken or fish or ham. Beef. Steak. Whatever that smell was that was so delicious. Once the food arrived at their table, Tonks wasted little time tucking in. She was ravenous. How she could have ignored the fact that she was hungry was beyond her. She ate faster than usual, hoping to satisfy the powerful craving she was feeling. She just needed to eat…and it had to be meat.

When Tonks' fourth plate arrived, Zach took the opportunity to say, "You know, it may help if you _chew_ the food."

"What?" Tonks asked, swallowing hard.

"Your food. You didn't hardly chew it."

Tonks smiled. "Sorry. I'm just so hungry! And this is delicious."

Zach gave her that look again. His eyes darted from her plate back up to her face.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. It's just…"

"Hum?" Tonks hummed, unable to open her mouth for fear of spitting her food everywhere.

"Well, you know that your meat is rare?

Tonks shrugged.

"I thought you liked it well done?"

"I dunno. If you didn't want me to eat it, why did you bring me here?" Tonks couldn't quite understand why he was even asking her these things. Did it really matter how she liked her steak cooked? "Does it bother you?"

Zach shook his head. "No, no. Just…surprised. I thought you would have ordered something lighter. Never have I seen you like this." Tonks could tell that he was holding back a laugh.

"What? Hungry?"

A small laugh escaped him. "If that is what you wish to call it."

She glanced down at her plate before offering him a smile. "You know what it might be?" She leaned forward a bit. "I miss Remus. That's what it is."

Zach looked more confused than ever. "Dora? A raw piece of meat makes you think about your husband?"

Tonks nearly spit out the bite in her mouth. "That's not how I meant it." She gulped down some water before explaining. "I mean that it's a full moon. Although…humm…." She stopped, lost in her thought.

"What is it?"

"Remus usually eats salad before the moon. That or soup. Something light though."

"Interesting," Zach said.

"Yeah, I learned about his routine by serving him the wrong thing once before a full moon. It was before we were together. I mean, I was interested in him and tryed to get his attention by cooking for him."

"You cook? I'm almost afraid."

"No, I can't cook, but I tried. I wanted to do something nice for him. My grandmum always said that a way to a man's heart is through his stomach."

"And you did what?"

"I went to the butcher and ordered up this huge steak for him. I mean huge. He was off on some business for Dumbledore, so that left me with time to get things ready. I remember my cousin Sirius laughing at me while I darted around the kitchen like an idiot." She chuckled lightly, lost in the memory.

"And what happened?"

"Well, of course when Remus came home and saw what I had been up to he was very flattered and all that. You know how Remus is - always so polite and never wants to upset the apple cart. He even ate some of it. It wasn't until after the full moon that I learned what I had done."

"What did you do?" Zach asked with a smile.

"I made him sick."

Zach laughed out loud at her.

"It's not funny!" she said, trying not to smile. "Too much heavy food is really bad for him before a transformation. And I hadn't just given him steak. I had the whole works. Potatoes, rolls, you name it. I really did him in. And…well…he had a really rough night because of it."

"A man in love would never reject such a gesture."

Tonks sighed and smiled a rather dreamy smile. "Yeah, I know."

"You are right, though. I would make the same mistake. A werewolf would want meat before a full moon, no?"

"Right. And even though I know better, I guess tonight I just…" she shrugged and let the thought go unfinished. "God, I'm stuffed," she said, looking at the empty plates around her. "Did I eat all this?"

"Si," Zach said with a laugh. "I thought that by feeling ill you would eat one, maybe two plates. I will never underestimate you again."

Feeling suddenly tired, Tonks stretched her arms over her head and yawned widely. An unexpected belch sounded from her mouth, drawing the eyes of several customers from other tables. Her hand flew to her mouth in horror. "Oh! Excuse me!"

Zach couldn't hold back laughing at her again.

_9:14 pm that same night _

She really did miss Remus. Having him away from her for so long was starting to wear her down. It didn't help matters that the moon was full and she was worried about him. She hated it when he spent a transformation away from her, where she couldn't get to him if he needed help. Tonks reminded herself that he wouldn't really need any help until the morning, but still, she liked having him close by just in case.

Needing to drown out the loneliness she was feeling, Tonks pulled out the old phonograph and put on the jazz music Remus was so fond of, donned one of his robes, and curled up by the fire with a book from his collection. It was something about talismans and dark objects, but Tonks wasn't reading it closely. She just turned the pages and glanced from picture to picture, her mind swimming with thoughts of Remus and hoping he wasn't hurt. Well, all things considered, she hoped he wasn't hurt worse than normal.

A sharpness in her side caused Tonks to double over in her seat. The book she was reading fell to the floor. _Stomach cramp!_ She groaned and shifted to try to ease the pain. The sensation started to dull, and Tonks picked up the book again. No sooner had she found a comfortable position than the pain returned again.

Good God! I ate too much! 

She stood and tried to stand up straight, stretching out the muscles in her mid section. She leaned back, ever so slightly to stretch further when a wave of light-headedness struck her hard. The dizziness was followed by a startling surge of nausea that overcame her and had her dashing to the loo. She threw open the door and emptied the contents of her stomach into the toilet.

God damn! 

She sat on the floor of the loo, out of breath and utterly confused by the sudden sick feeling. It overtook her once more and she wretched again. She stayed on the floor for a few more moments, waiting to see if the sickness had passed. Satisfied that she was feeling better, she stood and rinsed her mouth out at the sink. When she glanced in the mirror, she was astonished at what she saw.

She wasn't morphed.

At all.

And she hadn't noticed it.

How the hell did that happen? 

Morphing took concentration, but once she had her face and hair the way she liked it, she could usually hold it for a long time. She could even hold it while she slept if she really wanted to. Changing back into her natural shape always took a moment of total relaxation, and when it happened, she could feel it. It never hurt her to shape shift, but she could still feel it.

But she hadn't felt this. She hadn't _done_ this.

She considered her reflection for a moment before closing her eyes and making the necessary adjustments to her appearance. With her hair back to its shocking pink color and her nose and chin at the correct size and angle, she headed back into the lounge.

_How could I morph and not know it? I always know._

For some reason the room appeared smaller than usual, the music playing was louder, and the fire was much too hot. It was as if all her senses were heightened just enough to make her dizzy again.

_Whatever was in that food is sure doing something rotten to my stomach…and my head._

With two flicks of her wand, she put out the fire and shut off the phonograph.

_Sleep. I need sleep. _

The bedroom was only a few feet away, but her body was rapidly shutting down on her. She dragged her feet into the bedroom and collapsed onto the bed with an, "oomph." Looking briefly at the clock, she took note that once again she was beyond tired at a rather early hour. Half nine and going to bed? She was too young to be tired at half nine.

Her last thought before unconsciousness consumed her was that she was never going to let Zach suggest a restaurant ever again.


	5. Chapter 5

_AN: Thanks to all the reviwers. I'm a bit concerned that so many of you are thinking bad things about Zach, though. He's a nice guy! Really! You need to like him! It's REMUS that shouldn't like Zach. And as for the possibility of Tonks being pregnant…well…read the chapter._

_Thanks to Pel for the addition of Andromeda and to SS and Gryf for helping out, too._

Chapter 5 14 March 6:02 pm 

It had been a while since Tonks had held a newborn baby. The last baby born in her family was now almost two years old, and even then she hadn't spent much time cooing over the infant. There had been a war to fight and, being an Auror as well as a member of the Order of the Phoenix, Tonks was needed in the field. She loved babies, though, and managed to sneak in a few visits to her cousin's home for the chance to coo at the little one.

There was just something totally magical about a newborn baby. All the innocence – the hope for the future – was captured in that tiny little face. They could grow up to be anyone and anything imaginable. So very untouched by the tragedies of life. So perfectly cuddly and adorable.

The baby stretched lazily in Tonks' arms, whimpering in the process. "I think she's tired," Tonks said, smiling down at the bundle.

"She iz always tired," Fleur countered, crossing the room and taking her daughter from Tonks. "Exzept at two in zee morning. Zat iz when she will not sleep."

"Sounds like Nymphadora," Andromeda Tonks chimed in from behind her daughter. "She never slept."

"Eat, sleep, poop. That's all babies are good for," said Bill, stepping up next to his wife.

"Bill! Do not say zat in front of Noella," scolded Fleur.

"Well, aside from the poop, she really is a beautiful baby," said Tonks with a congratulatory smile.

"Yeah, she takes after her mother," said Bill, planting a quick kiss on Fleur's cheek.

Under his breath, Ted Tonks muttered, "Let's hope not." His wife affectionately elbowed him in the side. "I meant about being a Veela."

"Right," Andromeda said sarcastically.

"Bill – Fleur," Molly called from the kitchen. "You aren't leaving already, are you?"

"Yeah, 'fraid so, Mum."

"Ze baby needs zome quiet."

"And I think Fleur's tired, too," Bill added, winking at Fleur who did nothing to contradict him. Instead, she headed to the door.

"But you haven't had dessert!" Molly protested.

"Thanks mum, but I think we'll be fine." As Bill Leaned towards his mother, Tonks could just make out what he said next. "She's trying to lose the baby weight, you know. She doesn't want the sugar."

Molly rolled her eyes as if to say, "Oh, please."

Before Molly could convince them otherwise, Bill and Fleur were saying their goodbyes and heading out the door with their newborn. Tonks couldn't fight the smile on her face as she watched them go. After Greyback had attacked Bill, no one knew how severely he would be affected by the curse. His face would always have scars, and his cravings for food had changed somewhat, but he managed to escape the transformations. Then, less than a year ago, Fleur announced that she had become pregnant, proving once and for all that Bill's blood hadn't become tainted with lycanthropy.

_I'm so happy for them. They're so lucky._

"What are you smiling about?" Remus whispered in her ear.

"Oh, you know," Tonks said, trying to brush off the feelings she was having.

"Yes, I know," Remus sighed, kissing her forehead and wrapping an arm around her shoulder. "By the way, you didn't drop the baby," he said quietly, teasing her about something she had once said.

Tonks giggled and slapped his knee. "You're cruel."

They settled into the sofa while the Weasley's buzzed around the new baby for a few final moments. Her own parents had a gift for the baby that they insisted Fleur open before she and Bill left. It was a soft, white, hand-made blanket purchased at one of the finest shops in Diagon Alley. Tonks watched them, knowing that Remus was thinking the same thing she was. _That blanket should be for our baby. If only…_

The subject of having children had only been broached once between Tonks and Remus. It had been a slightly embarrassing moment for Tonks, and an even more heartbreaking one for Remus. It had happened just after Remus ended his assignment with the feral werewolves. He and Tonks had only been officially a couple for a short while, and given the fact that the war was in full swing, they had had very little time with one another. Frustrated and desperate to have some uninterrupted time alone, Remus had managed to convince Mad-Eye Moody to allow him to "kidnap" Tonks for two days. As soon as he received the clearance from Mad-Eye, Remus snuck into Tonks' room at the Three Broomsticks, pulled her off of her assignment, and whisked her away to a secluded cottage his parents had left him in southern England.

When they came back, everyone had known what the two of them had gotten up to, but neither of them minded. In fact, much to her mother's horror, Tonks later joked about how delightful it was to be able to spend almost two full days in bed. Remus blushed to his ears and received a congratulatory pat on the back from Fred Weasley. Everyone assumed the trip had been nothing but blissful and relaxing. What friends and family didn't realize was that there had been several long, deep, and painful conversations about the reality of their situation. One particularly emotional conversation concerned the impossibility of having children.

It wasn't as if they had consciously decided to talk about it, either. The subject came up quite accidentally. After a rather passionate evening, Tonks awoke to find Remus just as eager as she was to continue with the previous night's activities. He was kissing her neck and shoulders, trying to draw her ever closer to him. She wanted to give into him, but couldn't help but worry about the consequences.

"_Where are you going?" he said as she slid away from him._

"_I just have to get something."_

"_It can wait," he said longingly, pulling her back to him and reigning kisses on her body._

_Tonks moaned, hardly able to resist. She succumbed to his passion momentarily, but was still unable to escape the knowledge that a certain spell had yet to be performed. Reluctantly pushing away from him again, Tonks said, "Remus, please. Just…just…"_

"_No." He kissed her deeply. "Whatever it is," his mouth found her ear lobe, "it can wait." Her body responded to his as he pressed against her, making her fully aware of his intentions._

_Taking a deep breath she gathered her thoughts. "No, it can't." She pushed him off of her and sat up, pulling the sheet with her to cover her nakedness. "Just give me a sec."_

_Remus groaned in frustration. "What are you doing?"_

"_I need my wand." She glanced around the room. When they had entered the room last night it had been dark and full of shadows. Now that the sun was just beginning to rise, the room looked quite different. "Do you know where I put it?"_

"_Why do you need your wand?" Remus asked, completely perplexed._

"_Because I hadn't planned on seeing you this week."_

"_So?"_

"_Well, you snatched me away so quickly I didn't have time to get a potion."_

"_Potion?"_

"_Yes, so we have to do things the hard way." She reached across his body and grabbed up his wand from the bedside table. "Here, your wand is closer. You do it."_

"_Do what?"_

"_The charm."_

_At this, an utterly bewildered Remus sat up and took his wand from her. "Tonks, I have absolutely no idea what you are talking about. What charm? What potion?"_

"_A contraceptive one, of course." she said._

_Remus blinked._

"_I love you dearly," she added. "I just don't think it would be too wise to have a baby right now."_

_Remus was stunned._

"_I know, it's a total mood killer, isn't it? The spell doesn't last so we have to do it each time we…well…," she smiled brightly. "I did it last night while you were getting the drinks from the kitchen."_

"_Tonks - "_

_She continued very rapidly, ignoring his interruption. "I know that a potion would be a lot easier, and I promise that from now on I'll be taking one. I don't even know why I've waited, I mean, considering that we…well…we haven't had time to really. Just the one time and now - "_

"_Tonks wait. Stop, just stop." His voice was soft and gentle as he took her hand, forcing her to pay attention for a moment. _

_She bit her lip and blushed slightly. "Sorry."_

"_No, don't be sorry. I'm just…surprised that you…forgot."_

"_Are you kidding? My mother used to say that I'd forget my head if it weren't attached. I've just been so focused on my assignment that I didn't give the potion enough thought."_

"_I'm not talking about the potion."_

_Tonks gave him a puzzled look._

_Remus' voice grew very soft. "Tonks, love, I'm a werewolf. You don't _need_…a potion."_

_As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Tonks realized her mistake. Suddenly she felt very ridiculous. "Oh, God." Remus looked back at her sadly. "Oh, Remus, I don't know how I could have…I mean…I didn't think…I'm so sorry."_

"_No, don't. Don't apologize."_

"_But I should never have even -"_

"_No, really. You don't have to apologize. You don't have to say anything. It's not _your_ fault." He placed his wand back on the bedside table._

_She didn't like the way he said that last bit. She frowned at him, her voice more firm. "It's not your fault, either. I know better. I've read nearly everything there is to read about lycanthropy. I don't know why I even thought that I would - "_

"_Because you're a woman, and I think that most women have, at some point in their life, considered having children."_

"_So do most men," Tonks pointed out._

"_Yes, but men don't physically…well…"_

"_I think I know what you're trying to say. That it's different for woman since we're the ones who actually _have _the babies."_

"_Yes," Remus said, meeting her gaze and holding it firmly. "It's only natural for you to want children," he added very softly._

_Tonks bit at her lip. "I thought this was all about me _not _wanting children. After all, a contraceptive charm prevents all of that from happening."_

"_But you do want them," Remus said, his shoulders dropping in disappointment._

_She did want children, but how do you say that to the person you love when you know it's impossible? She opted for a different route. "Oh, come on. Any kid of mine would probably scream all the time. And when I'd pick him up to comfort him, I'd most likely trip over some toy on the floor, send the baby flying through the air, and watch as he lands on his little head. I mean really, can you see me with a baby?"_

"_Yes, I can," Remus said, his voice barely a whisper. "If you want a family, Tonks, then I suggest that you - "_

"_Don't say that!" she demanded, her voice stern. "Don't even think it. Yes, I'd like to have a baby, but the fact of the matter is that only person in the world that I want to have a family with is you. So if you can't… well, then we'll make do. I don't know, maybe we'll adopt. Who knows?"_

"_Dearest, no one in their right mind would give a baby to a werewolf."_

"_Okay, so we'll just be us. We'll be able to lie in on Sunday mornings. We can Apparate whenever we want and never use the floo. We can shag all over the house and never have to worry about being interrupted. I mean, come on." Remus frowned at her. "Don't look so glum. Please, Remus. Just forget what I said. It was stupid of me to say it."_

_Remus had a very far away look in his eye. He wet his lips and said, "When James and Lily got married, I was so happy for them. I tried hard to not be jealous of what they had. I never thought that I'd find someone with whom I could share all my secrets without them rejecting me. I was content knowing that my friends accepted me, and that would have to be enough. It wasn't until Harry was born that I was truly envious of James."_

_Tonks reached out and took his hand. "You do know that you would make a really excellent father, don't you?"_

_Remus gave a small laugh and shook his head._

"_I'm serious. You have a way with kids. I've heard Neville Longbottom go on about you, not to mention Harry and the others."_

"_I do love children," he admitted. "Ironic, don't you think."_

"_No. I think it's wonderful."_

"_Wonderful? Even though we'll never have any?"_

"_I think we're lucky to have what we've got. All the rest is just decoration."_

_Remus looked at her lovingly. "I mean it, Tonks. If you want out, then I promise that I won't -"_

"_Stop it. I don't want out." She shifted closer to him. "I fought too long and hard to get here to give you up now." Gently, she brushed her lips across his. "I love you."_

Nothing more had been said about it. There wasn't anything really _to_ say. Since then, they had managed to acknowledge the subject wordlessly through sad smiles and long looks. Like now. It was bittersweet to watch Bill and Fleur with Noella. They knew it would be a somewhat difficult evening to get through. After all, they willingly accepted Molly's invitation to join them for dinner knowing full well that Bill and Fleur would be there with the baby.

The door to the Burrow closed and the house was suddenly very quiet. Remus and Tonks were left alone with Tonks' parents while Molly and Arthur cleaned up the kitchen and readied their company for tea. Feeling slightly uneasy by the calmness of the room, Tonks stood up and excused herself. She went into the loo and closed the door, wanting to be alone for a moment. _Put on a brave face. Don't let Remus see you worked up over this. _When she was finished, she took a moment to splash some water on her face hoping to make herself look relaxed.

On her way back into the lounge, Tonks overheard two very soft and anxious voices coming from the kitchen. "If you think that way then you should ask her," her mother said.

"Me? Oh, heavens, I couldn't. The whole thing seems so unnatural," Molly replied.

"Good grief, Molly. Muggles have been doing it for years."

"That doesn't mean it's a good thing. Why just a few years ago, Arthur was sewn up by a Muggle doctor. Sewn up! Like a piece of cloth."

"But Nymphadora knows all about the Muggle way of things. Ted has entertained us with all sorts of Muggle contraptions for years. Muggle medicine wouldn't frighten her."

"Then _you _ask her!"

"Ask me what?" Tonks said as she entered the room, having heard enough of the odd conversation.

Molly smiled brightly, pretending nothing was amiss. "Nothing, dear. Nothing. Come and help us with the tea," she requested.

"Molly, are you sure you want my help? You used to yell at me for even stepping foot in the kitchen at Grimmauld Place."

"True." Molly granted her a warm smile. "All right, you caught us. We don't need any help."

"We just thought that we could get in a bit of…er… girl talk before joining the men."

"Girl talk?" Molly asked sounding confused. She glanced at Andromeda, her eyes going wide. "Oh yes. Girl talk."

"Yes, you know, gossip about the men in our lives - the silly things they do and all that," Andromeda explained as Molly started scurrying around the kitchen gathering up cups and saucers for everyone.

Tonks bent over, resting her elbows on the counter and very nearly laughing at the two of them. "What did Dad do this time?"

"No, no. Let's start with you. You and Remus." Her mother's eyebrows waggled somewhat suggestively. "How are _things_ with you two?"

Stunned, Tonks asked, "Mum, if you're asking me what I think you're asking me…"

"Oh, come on. I just want to know how it's all going."

Tonks shook her head, blushing as Molly looked on anxiously. "I don't believe you, Mum. In front of Molly even!"

"Oh, pish posh," Molly chimed. "You're acting like one of my boys who thinks I haven't a clue about what they get up to. I mean, really, there are six of them; a Hungarian horntail didn't drop them on the doorstep. I may be older, but I'm not dead. I would think that having seven children is proof enough that I'm not naive about that sort of thing."

"Of course," Tonks laughed, trying to put the current mental image Molly was presenting out of her mind. "You're quite right."

Molly cut into the cake she had made and began dishing slices onto plates. "One could even say that Arthur and I are _experts_ at the whole business. And yet my children pretend that I don't even know what it is."

Tonks covered her face in embarrassment.

"So, tell us then. How are things?" her mother prodded again.

"You're not going to give up until I at least say something, are you?" Slumping forward, Tonks said, "All right. Things are good. Better than good. Everything is wonderful."

Molly hummed affirmatively, but it was Andromeda that voiced the next question. "And how does he feel about your er…" she leaned closer to Tonks, dropping the volume of her voice, "condition."

"What condition?"

"Nymphadora, you can talk about it with us. We know it's probably still early and you're not yet ready to tell everyone."

"Oh yes, I've been there," Molly said.

"We've both been there, and for that reason we can tell."

Tonks was very confused. "You can tell what?"

Molly's mouth formed a perfect "o" as she looked back at the younger woman. "Really, Tonks, We've been watching you all night. You've hurried off to the loo now four times."

"That's probably the worst part of the first few months," Andromeda said. "Well, that and the upset stomach."

Tonks was still at a loss.

"Yes, exactly. You hardly touched your dinner, and I know for a fact that Shepherd's Pie is one of your favorites," Molly said.

Tonks really didn't understand. "I just haven't been feeling well, is all."

"Precisely. An upset stomach. I've used that one myself to keep Arthur from asking questions," laughed Molly.

"What?" Tonks asked, still totally lost at the whole purpose of the conversation.

"Not to mention how pale you look," Molly added, examining Tonks' features with a worried eye. "More than pale. Tired. Yes, you look tired."

"And you once told me that a metamorph never looks tired," her mother pointed out.

Tonks frowned. "It's just from being overworked, that's all."

Molly ignored the comment and broke out in a wide grin. "Except for when you held the baby. Oh, Tonks, you were positively glowing."

Her mother smiled just as brightly. "Now stop pretending that there isn't anything going on and tell us about the - " Andromeda waved a hand at Tonks' lower abdomen, "the situation. I admit that I'm a little flustered at becoming a gandmum, but I'm too interested in how you did it. I know about the mechanics, of course, but considering that Remus is, well, that he can't - "

"Hang on. Wait a second," Tonks burst out, stopping them both. "Are you saying that - " The idea was totally absurd. Dropping her voice to a whisper Tonks asked, "You think I'm pregnant?"

"Yes, of course." Disappointment flashed on Molly's face. "You mean you're not?"

"No!" Tonks said quickly. She thought a moment and added another, "No. How could I be?"

Her mother looked crestfallen. "Well, we didn't know, that's why we were curious."

Tonks' mind began to process the whole conversation rapidly. Thoughts of feeling ill at odd times, craving unusual foods, the unexplainable feeling of being tired all the time. It all had a logical explanation, surely.

_It can't be…I can't be…can I? _

Her mother's voice pulled her from her thoughts. "Muggles have a way of getting around problems like yours and Remus'. Considering what your cousin Julia went through, and how well that turned out, I thought that perhaps you and Remus gave it a go."

Her mother was correct. Muggles did have ways of getting around certain biological problems. Tonks had a distant cousin on her father's side that went though something like what her mum was suggesting. "You thought that Remus and I went to a Muggle doctor for some sort of fertility procedure?"

"Don't look so shocked. Given your behavior tonight, we had good reason to suspect something was going on," admitted her mother.

Molly gave a sad smile. "You probably think it was silly of us, but you looked so happy holding Noella."

"We assumed that you found a donor."

"Donor?" Tonks asked, waiting for her mother to explain. But Tonks suddenly cottoned on and rolled her eyes, groaning in the process. "I could never do that."

"Not even for a family of your own?" Molly asked.

"No, it would be too strange – having a baby with a man who wasn't your husband." No sooner were the words out of her mouth than the realization of the situation hit her like an Unforgivable Curse. She remembered the events of her last undercover assignment and felt the blood drain from her face.

Oh no… 

_NO._

_He didn't. I would have known if he had. _

_It's impossible._

_I can't be pregnant._

"Are you all right?" Molly asked.

Tonks forced herself to smile. "Just thinking." When neither Molly nor her mother said anything in reply, Tonks laughed and tried to play things safe. "Look, I'm not pregnant, I'm just tired. Work has been hard and with Remus gone for long bouts of time, I'm just feeling a bit stressed, that's all." The older women didn't look satisfied with that answer. "I promise you, both of you, if Remus and I ever decide to do anything about starting a family, you will be among the first to know."

Molly and Andromeda looked at each other skeptically, but decided to drop the subject for the time being. They didn't press Tonks for any more information and had their tea while discussing Ginny's upcoming wedding to Harry Potter. Tonks tried to keep up with the chatter, but found her mind drifting frequently to the possibility of having a baby – a baby that wasn't Remus'. She cast a worried look over at Remus, but he and her father were too engrossed in trying to explain to Arthur how the telephone worked to notice anything amiss.

It wasn't until hours later when they were back home and Remus was crawling into bed next to her that he noticed anything was wrong. "You've been quiet all evening. Are you sure you're feeling well?"

_Yeah, I'm just fine for someone who might be pregnant…with no chance that if I am pregnant that it's my husband's baby. This can't be happening! _

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just tired."

"Then let's get some sleep." He kissed her quickly and rolled over to find a comfortable position.

Tonks' mind was racing. _Should I say something to him? Or should I just wait? _

_Wait, yes._

_Although…if he finds out, he won't be happy that I didn't tell him._

_I should tell him._

_I'll wait until after I see a healer. When I know for certain._

_But I _do_ know for certain._ There hadn't been time for a spell or a visit to a healer to tell Tonks if her mother's and Molly's suspicions were correct. And really, a spell wasn't needed to find out the truth. Simple maths told Tonks that her last cycle had been nearly seven weeks ago.

_Seven weeks…_

_Right before my assignment._

_How did I not notice this?_

"By the way," Remus mumbled into his pillow. Tonks was certain he had figured something out and her heart began to race. "You looked beautiful tonight."

She swallowed, unsure of her voice. "Thanks."

"Especially when you held Noella. You looked…right at home with her."

Tonks managed an uneasy laugh and shifted so that Remus couldn't look at her face. She couldn't tell him. Not now. It would have to wait. Yes, wait and see what happens. Hopefully there would be another explanation than the one she feared. She knew it was doubtful, but for tonight it was all she had.


	6. Chapter 6

**CHAPTER SIX**

_22 March – 12:37 pm_

The Leaky Cauldron was crowded this afternoon. The low hum of casual conversations that generally filled the air was more like a steady roar today. Tonks reconsidered her decision to meet Zach here. The fact that the place was busy meant that the staff wouldn't hound them as frequently. However, given the noise level, she worried about how discreetly she would be able to talk to him. And she needed to talk to him. He was the only one who knew the full situation. She wanted his opinion…and possibly his help in figuring out what to do.

It had been a long, and emotionally draining week. Unable to believe that she had been wrong about so many things, Tonks tried with all her might to ignore the suggestion that she could be pregnant. Her body wasn't like clockwork. After all, being a metamorph screws up more than just the appearance of your _out_sides. Hoping that it was the morphing that made her cycle late, Tonks waited the full week before seeking a professional opinion.

It was the longest week of her life. Being around Remus at a time like this was more than difficult; it was down right painful. She felt guilty every time she looked at him – every time he smiled at her. She considered telling him she wasn't feeling well, but that would only raise his suspicions. She couldn't very well avoid him, but she did her best to stay late at work to do just that. It was trying to her soul because the one person she needed the most right now was the one person she _couldn't_ lean on. If this really was nothing, she certainly didn't want to start a fire by mentioning the possibility.

Yet she knew it was true. Her body was betraying her in the worst way. Every time she felt hungry, she would consciously consider the cause of her craving. Was she really hungry, or was it just the baby? She couldn't ignore the fact that if she drank anything at all, no matter how little, she was off and running to the loo. In fact, she was spending more and more time in the loo than she cared to admit.

The biggest give away, however, came at night. The guilt she felt during the day was nothing to what she felt curling up next to Remus in bed. And when he would reach for her, she couldn't pull away. She wanted him to know she loved him. She needed to feel his body next to hers. She wanted that comfort that only he could give her. But when he touched her breasts, the sensitivity in them told her that time was growing short. And when they made love, the feeling was more intense than she had ever experienced. It was her proof, and she knew in her mind what her heart was unwilling to accept.

That was when she decided to visit a medi-witch and have her worst fears confirmed. It was one thing to accept the fact that she was pregnant, but it was another thing to accept that she had been raped. In her mind she still didn't believe it. Clearly she had been, but it was too sickening to even acknowledge.

She had to find help. She had to talk to someone. Her instinct was to go to her mother, but she didn't want to risk having her mother tell Remus. She needed to talk to someone who knew the situation and who wasn't so close to Remus.

So she Owled Zach and asked him to meet her for lunch.

When Zach walked through the door of the pub with a bright smile on his face, Tonks waved him over to her and explained that a table was being cleared for them. Zach only frowned at her and asked, "What is the matter?"

Tonks smiled, trying to make the knot in her stomach go away. "What makes you think something's the matter?"

"You're letter gave no specifics, but Dora, I know that face." He held her gaze for a moment.

Glancing around, making sure no one was listening in, Tonks leaned close to him and said, "I have some bad news."

"What kind of bad news?"

She gave another worried look around the room before very softly admitting to him the full, horrific truth. "I'm pregnant."

At first Zach looked confused by her announcement. Then he looked lost in thought. "But…I don't…you said that was impossible, that Remus couldn't…"

"He can't."

Their eyes met once more. "Then…how?" he simply asked.

She bit at her lip, fighting back the tears that had been threatening to fall all day, "LaMont," she mouthed at him.

Zach's eyes went wide. "WHAT? DORA! You told me you went to a healer!"

The waiter chose that moment to step in and offer to take them to their table. They were seated at a booth at the far side of the room, which seemed to offer some seclusion. Tonks ordered some tea for them both, as Zach continued to stare furiously at her.

Once the waiter walked away, Tonks said, "Don't be angry at me."

"Don't be angry? Dora, you promised me! You told me you went to a healer."

"Yes, I did, but - "

"But?"

"I just…got patched up. That's all."

"You didn't have them even check?"

"No. I told you. Nothing like that happened." She rolled her eyes at her mistake. "At least, I didn't _think_ anything happened."

"Obviously you were wrong."

"Yes, I know I was wrong! I know!" She hid her face in her hands, resting her elbows on the table. She did not want Zach to see her cry, no matter how angry she was at herself for being so careless, or how angry she was at her friend for not being more sympathetic.

"Are you sure?" Zach asked, his voice sounding concerned.

She peaked out at him through her fingers. "I had the medi-witch do the spell three times to check."

"How long have you known?"

She folded her arms in front of her chest. "Since yesterday. I mean, Molly Weasley and my mum were pestering me about it a week ago. They saw something that I didn't. Really, I didn't. And I told them it wasn't what they thought, because I honestly didn't believe it was possible. Then this whole week I've been worried." Her face flushed pick to match her hair, "I thought that maybe I would get some proof this week…you know, that it wasn't true." Zach looked as if he might crawl under the table once he realized what she meant. Wetting her lips, Tonks finished the thought, "But when nothing happened…well…I went to the midi-witch and…"

Zach slumped forward, rubbing his eyes with his fingers. "Oh, Dora. I'm so sorry."

"Don't. Really. Don't. It's not your fault."

"Nor it is entirely your fault. I was there that night. I should have insisted - "

"It was my choice, though," Tonks interrupted. "I'm the one that didn't take precautions the way I should have."

"Precautions? Dora, you had no idea."

Not being able to hold back the emotion any more, Tonks' head dropped forward and she allowed the tears to fall. "I'm so ashamed," she admitted softly. "I was so stupid to even be in that situation. It was even my idea! I mean, my God, how cruel is that? Now I have to deal with knowing how far it really went. Because I didn't think…I didn't think that it happened…but it did."

They sat in silence for a few moments, Tonks sniffling through tears, before Zach asked the obvious question, "Does Remus know?"

Tonks snorted. "Are you kidding? How the hell am I supposed to tell him something like this?"

"You need to tell him."

"Yeah sure. That will go over well."

"He will understand."

"Oh, come on." She put on a mockingly happy tone and said, "Remus, darling, you know I love you, but I did something rather stupid and now I'm pregnant with another man's baby." She shook her head, a sob escaping her. "Yeah, I'm sure he'll understand."

"You don't say it like that. God, Dora."

"Well really, Zach. I can't tell him this. It will kill him! I know it will!"

"He loves you and he didn't grow angry when you told him about that night."

She avoided his eyes. "Not…really. I told him most of it, but I didn't tell him everything."

Zach only looked back at her in disbelief.

"I know. I should have told him. I shouldn't have kept it a secret, but I honestly didn't see that there was any reason to worry him." Tonks sobbed heavily, "I wish I had told him the truth. I never meant to lie to him like this."

Zach sighed and leaned back in his seat. "You do realize that this isn't something you can hide from him. At some point it will become obvious."

"I know," she said sadly. "What do I do? The medi-witch said I'm at least five weeks along. That gives me a few weeks to figure something out, I suppose."

Suddenly, Zach sat forward. "Five weeks, you say?" The wheels in his brain were noticeably spinning.

"Yeah, _at least_ five. I'm guessing it's more like seven though."

"Because the incident happened in early February."

"That's why I think it's more like seven."

Zach smiled, his entire countenance changing. "No. No. What if the medi-witch is correct and it _is _only five?"

Before Tonks could argue the validity of his suggestion, the waiter returned with their tea. "Sorry it took so long. We're backed up today," he explained.

"No problem," Zach said. "We need to be leaving as it is." Tonks began to protest, but Zach took her hand and said, "Yes, Dora. We need to go. Trust me." He took out some money and handed it to the waiter. "For your trouble." He turned back to look at her with excitement. "Where is Remus today?"

"He's meeting with his new assignment. Why?"

"This might take some time, but I think I can help you."

Zach pulled her to her feet before she could stop him. "We didn't eat."

"I have just thought of something and it can not wait."

"But Zach…"

"Trust me." He smiled brightly and tugged on her hand to get her to follow him. Tonks shrugged and decided she didn't have many other options but to trust him. If he had a plan to help her, if he had any ideas of how to explain things to Remus, then she needed to follow him.

Zach and Tonks pushed their way through the crowd waiting to be seated and passed through the door without a backward glance. They didn't even notice the man sitting at the booth behind them, watching them leave. Watching them in total incredulity. His face white. His heart beat racing. Horror barely checked just beneath the surface.

A younger man joined him at the table. "Are you all right?" he asked out of concern.

The man licked his lips. "No, I'm not all right."

"What's the matter?"

"I've just heard…some very…upsetting news," he admitted, fighting the urge to break down then and there.

"What is it?" the younger man asked.

Swallowing hard, the man leaned forward and said, "Andrew listen. I need to take care of something. I need to…I'm not even sure where to begin, but…I'm sorry but I must cut our meeting short."

"Of course. Don't even think about it, Remus. Whatever it is, I can see it has you very upset."

Remus nodded. "You have no idea."

"Go. Take care of whatever it is you need to take care of."

"Thank you, Andrew. I'll – I'll contact you later."

_1:18 pm the same day_

For reasons she still didn't quite understand, Tonks _Apparated_ just outside the phone booth which served as the secret entrance to the Ministry of Magic. Zach had already picked up the phone and begun the usual process of obtaining access.

Tonks had to ask. "Why are we here?"

"Because what you need is in the lab."

"The lab?" she asked as the floor to the phone booth dropped and they began their descent into the Ministry.

"Si. What you need is in there."

Tonks thought for a moment. After her mission failed, Moody went about obtaining information from Darrius, as well as other former Death Eaters, by using polyjuice potion. Several cauldrons of the potion were currently being brewed in the lab reserved for the Aurors. Thus, the only thing in the lab currently was the remnants of the potion, and Tonks didn't very well see how that was going to help her situation.

They stepped out of the phone booth and headed down the hall, past the fountain, to the lifts. "Why would I need polyjuice potion?" Tonks asked, befuddled by the very idea.

"No, we do not have the potion yet. We are brewing it."

"Right. So…?"

He looked down at her face. "We are making one for LaMont."

The door to the lift opened and Tonks followed Zach inside. "I know, and I

still don't get it. What good is polyjucie potion at this stage of the game. I don't see how it will help."

"It's not the potion I'm interested in but rather one of the ingredients."

"Zach, what are you talking about?"

"His hair. We have a sample of his hair."

Tonks rubbed her eyes. "I'm really not understanding this."

"I will explain once we arrive. Trust me."

The lift stopped on level two and they proceeded to the Auror Headquarters. The usual spattering of witches and wizards were there, busy at their individual tasks. Zach took Tonks' hand and pulled her into a large room at the end of the hall, which served as a laboratory for brewing all sorts of potions and trying out new and possibly dangerous spells. Without any hesitation, Zach walked up to the tabletop where several vials of ingredients sat waiting to be used in the various potions. He looked over several of the labels before picking one up and holding it out to Tonks.

"This one. This is his."

She took it from him hesitantly. "Why would I want his hair?"

"To prove that he is not the one who fathered your child."

Utterly bewildered, Tonks made a face and said, "What? What are you talking about?"

"Do you believe that LaMont raped you?"

Tonks sucked in her breath. "Well, obviously he did."

"No, that is not what I asked. I said, do you _believe_ it?"

She thought for a moment. Every fiber of her being told her that it didn't happen that way. She would have known…she would have felt something. "No, I don't, but seeing as how I'm pregnant – I mean, how else would I - "

"Remus," Zach said pointedly.

Tonks looked up at him in confusion. "Remus? No, that's impossible."

"Why is it impossible?" he asked with a scandalous smile. "I know you British have a reputation for not being as amorous as the Spanish, but certainly you two have shared a bed, no?"

Eyes going wide, Tonks gasped at him and blushed slightly. "Yes…but still…"

"But what?"

"Zach, it can't happen like that. The lycanthropy makes it impossible for him to have a child."

Zach frowned. "No, that is not exactly what I know of the curse. Is impossible for him to have a child with, forgive me Dora, a normal human. But you are different."

"Right. Okay. I _could _get pregnant, but it wouldn't last. At the full moon, my body would reject it and I'd lose the baby. If I were a werewolf then yeah, Remus could be the father. But I'm not a werewolf."

"No, but you are a metamorph."

Tonks blinked. A cold shiver ran down her spine sending gooseflesh all over her body. "What do you mean?"

Zach took a step closer, fixing his gaze on her. "There is something in Remus' blood that forces him to change his shape under the light of a full moon. And there is something in your blood that allows you to change your shape at will. Is it not possible, even remotely, that whatever it is in your blood that lets you morph is similar to what is in his that makes him transform?"

Tonks couldn't speak. What Zach was suggesting was unfathomable.

Zach leaned even closer to her. "If I am right, your blood might be compatible with his. Perhaps when the moon was full, instead of losing the baby, your body shifted to…how do you say… accommodate the baby?"

Tonks' head was spinning with the possibility. She went over every detail of the last full moon in her mind, remembering every element as best she could. "I was sick…during the last full moon."

"I haven't never seen you eat like that before."

"Raw meat," she whispered.

"Exactamente."

"And then at home - " she gasped, her hand covering her mouth.

"What is it?"

"I was sick at home. Actually sick. I threw up. And after, when I looked in the mirror, I wasn't morphed. And the room felt so small. And the fire felt so hot." She looked up into his eyes as realization sunk in. "Oh my God, Zach. Do you…do you really think…?"

"Si. I do. I would not mention it if I didn't believe it to be true. You said it has been five weeks, no? Five weeks was near Valentine's Day."

Tonks' heart skipped a beat. "The new moon." She swallowed hard. "It was a new moon…when Remus is technically more human." Tonks nervously ran her hands through her hair. "Oh God." She couldn't quite stand still, her arms wrapped around her body in an attempt to remain in control. "Oh, God! What do I do?"

"You find out if I am right."

"How? I can't tell Remus. I don't even dare suggest something like this to him unless I know it's true."

"Which is why you need LaMont's hair."

She looked down at the vial in her quivering hand. "And what am I supposed to do with his hair?"

"You test it against the baby. You see if he is the father. If he isn't, then you know it is Remus."

It made sense, but there was still a problem. "How am I supposed to test it?"

Zach wet his lips, his eyebrows going up. "That is difficult, but there is a way. There is a Witch Doctor…in Knockturn Alley. I have asked her assistance a few times on difficult cases."

Tonks was stunned. "A Witch Doctor? Zach!"

"I know it is illegal, but she will not hurt you. She is not evil. She just…likes to do things her way." He placed a hand on her shoulder. "It will cost money, but she can do this test for you."

"You're talking about blood magic, aren't you?"

"Do you know another way?"

Tonks exhaled the breath she had been holding, uncertain if she was ready to go to this extreme. Any magic involving blood was illegal by Wizard Law. Muggles were known to stick needles into their bodies and use their blood for all sorts of experiments. It was disgusting and unnatural to the magical community. Only those wizards dealing in the dark arts used blood in potions or spells. Tonks could get into real trouble if she were caught tampering with such magic. She could lose her job. Worse, she could end up in Azkaban.

She didn't have any other choice.

"I'll do it, but I'm going alone."

"That is out of the question. I cannot allow you to do this by yourself."

"Zach, I appreciate your concern, but I don't want you risking your job for me. This isn't your problem."

"I was careless and left you alone with him. If I am wrong about this, then I am to blame."

"Zach, it isn't your fault, so stop saying that it is. Besides, you've been too great of a help."

"Not as much help as was necessary, or we would not be having this conversation. I am going without. Someone has to make sure that you are not followed."

"I don't want you risking your job for this. You're going to get into enough trouble when they realize LaMont's hair is gone."

Zach smirked. "True."

"So, where do I go? Who is this Witch Doctor?"

"Her name is Venoma. Petra Venoma."


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

22 March 1:27 pm 

With his head hung low, Remus Lupin made his way through the busy streets of Muggle London. No one seemed to notice him, even when he stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and just stood there lost in thought. The people walked around him, brushing past him as if he wasn't even there. It was fitting really. After all, he had spent most of his life trying not to be noticed. Life was easier that way. It was only when he would allow someone to notice him – to become a part of his life – that things became difficult.

Like now.

He had fought against his feelings for Tonks for more than two years. He could not – would not allow her into his life. It would be too painful when it ended, for he knew nothing that good could last forever. He had seen too many lives shattered by war and tragedy to be that naive. Tonks had had other plans, though. The more he had resisted her, the harder she fought, until Remus found it impossible to resist any longer.

She had said she didn't care about the age difference. The fact that he was poor was no big deal to her. She had sworn that she loved him despite the gruesome curse that plagued his life. She had promised him that she would always be there for him - that she would never leave him. And Remus had believed her.

_I've been a fool._

For some time now, he had been suspicious of Garcia's feelings towards Tonks, but Remus never thought it would go so far that she would actually betray him. Tonks had said time and again that she and Garcia were only friends.

_Friends with benefits…_

When he heard her voice in the Leaky Cauldron that afternoon, he started to turn around to say, "Hello," wanting to take the opportunity to introduce Andrew to her. But there was something in Tonks' voice that held Remus back from making his presence known. She was very upset, crying even, and saying things about going to a medi-witch. Garcia was with her, commenting on a night he spent together with Tonks. And then, as if what he had already heard wasn't more than enough, came the bone-chilling announcement from Tonks herself that she was pregnant.

Remus' heart skipped a beat at that moment. No, it was more than that. It was as if his heart had stopped altogether.

_Pregnant._

For a baby that obviously hadn't been fathered by Remus.

And Garcia took responsibility.

For a moment, Remus scolded himself. The very idea that Tonks would betray him in this manner was beyond belief. Yet, as his mind digested the information, he recalled several events that forced him to reevaluate what he had thought was the truth. The flowers from Garcia on Valentine's Day – the forgotten wedding ring – the whispered conversations. Garcia was well liked by everyone, men and women. He was handsome, intelligent, and with that touch of Latin air to him, why wouldn't Tonks be attracted to him? All those facts were enough to give Remus pause, but it was Tonks' subtle reactions to Remus' touch recently that made him believe the impossible. For the first time since they began their relationship, she would turn away from him in the night. And the few times they had made love lately, she had been skittish. It was almost as if she didn't want him putting his hands on her.

_It's guilt. She feels guilty…that she doesn't love me the way she loves him_.

It was too much for his heart to take.

A sudden wave of anger overcame him, forcing his feet to move rapidly down the street. He had brought this upon himself. His efforts to live a normal life had never gone as planned. It wasn't something he was supposed to have. He was a cursed being and he should have known better than to pretend otherwise. He had lived too long, felt too much heartache, and yet he still had allowed himself to believe that happiness was possible for a being like him. But not anymore.

As shameful as the situation was, Remus needed to speak to someone – a friend who would tell him these feelings were justified. He needed to expel some of his anger and frustration before he approached Tonks and questioned her about her loyalty. He needed a friend that could look at the facts as an impartial observer and confirm that Remus' thoughts on the matter were warranted. And he couldn't wait. He needed to have this conversation now before he did something he would regret.

Stepping into the phone booth that served as the secret entrance to the Ministry of Magic, Remus picked up the receiver and asked the female voice to admit him as Arthur Weasley's guest. He was informed that Arthur hadn't come into work today, which surprised him, but made him feel slightly more at ease. Remus had never enjoyed visiting the Ministry and being forced to wear the embarrassing ID badge that every visitor was required to wear, much less the _special_ badge that was mandatory for all werewolves to wear while at the Ministry of Magic. Nor did he like having to hand over his wand to a stranger. Arthur's absence from the Ministry meant Remus could visit him at home, a much more comfortable place, indeed.

A few moments later, Remus _Apparated_ outside of the Burrow. He knocked on the door and was greeted by the cheerful face of Molly Weasley. "Remus! To what do we owe this delightful surprise?"

"Is Arthur home today?"

"Yes. He wasn't feeling well all weekend and I insisted he give himself one more day to recuperate." Her smile suddenly vanished as she noticed the scowl on Remus face. "What's the matter? Has something happened?"

As much as he enjoyed Molly's company, he wasn't sure she was the best choice to confide in at the moment. He wanted another man's opinion, not to mention the fact that he had overheard Tonks say that Molly knew she was pregnant. "Please, Molly, I would just like to speak with Arthur - alone."

She frowned, but allowed him to come in. She led him to the lopsided shed out back where Arthur stored his Muggle collection. "He's in there doing Merlin knows what. I'll put some tea on, should you two want to come inside."

Remus nodded and waited for her to retreat back into the house before knocking on the door. Arthur's voice sounded muffled as he called out, "I'll be done in a moment, Molly."

"It's not Molly. It's Remus."

Something metal clattered to the floor, and Arthur could be heard muttering angrily, "Damn." He opened the door looking rather disheveled. "I'm sorry, Remus. I wasn't expecting company."

Remus looked the other man over. "What are you doing?"

Arthur glanced over Remus' shoulder toward the house. "Don't tell Molly." He pulled Remus inside and closed the door. "I'm working on a gift for her," he said, proudly placing a hand on top of what appeared to be a washing machine. "Crazy old Rosalie Oreck thought she would get revenge on a Muggle woman she didn't care for and charmed the thing to shrink any clothing washed in it."

"And why exactly are you going to give it to Molly?" Remus asked.

"If I can fix it, I think she'd appreciate it, especially if I can charm it to clean in half the time."

Remus gave a half smile at his friend. It was typical of Arthur to take a Muggle item and add a magical twist, even if the Ministry frowned upon doing such things. Arthur couldn't see the danger as long as no harm was being done.

"Molly said you weren't feeling well."

Arthur looked guilty for a moment. "Well…I didn't want her coming out here and finding this thing before I finished with it. So, I told her I wasn't feeling well as an excuse to stay home today. I figured if I told her I felt better after lunch, that she'd let me come putter around in the shed and then I'd have enough time to hopefully finish this up."

Remus nodded, his mind considering how often couples kept secrets from each other – even a couple married as long as Molly and Arthur had been.

"Is something the matter?" Arthur asked.

Feeling suddenly uneasy about the purpose of his visit, Remus looked down at the floor. "I shouldn't have bothered you. I'm sorry."

"Remus," Arthur said taking a step closer to his friend. "There had to be a purpose to your visit. You certainly didn't come over here to talk about a washing machine."

"No, I didn't, but…" Remus pursed his lips and shook his head, not knowing exactly what it was he wanted to say.

"Really, now. What's the matter? You look as if you've just lost your best friend."

Remus closed his eyes and said very softly, "I have."

Arthur's brow furrowed. "Has someone been hurt or …?"

He took a deep breath, struggling for the right words. "It's…Tonks."

Worry filled Arthur's face. "Oh, no! What happened?"

Remus was at a total loss for words. His heart was beating rapidly while his mind raced, still putting the pieces all together. He felt nauseated, like his insides were as twisted around as they get during a transformation. How could Tonks do this to him? And how could he be expected to explain the circumstances to his friend when even his own mind didn't quite understand the whole situation?

"Remus, you have me very worried here. I don't think I've ever seen you like this."

"I'm sorry, I - " Remus wet his dry lips, "I've never before been in this situation so I'm not sure how…or what…"

"What situation? For Merlin's sake Remus, just tell me what's the matter with Tonks."

Swallowing hard, Remus said, "She's pregnant."

There was a deafening silence as Arthur looked back at him in total confusion. "What?"

"Pregnant," Remus repeated, slumping down into a tattered seat next to the wall. "She's going to have a baby."

"Well," Arthur said, his eyes twinkling again in delight. "I believe I may have a passing familiarity with the word 'pregnant'. You don't need to define it for me." He chuckled and then added with a bright smile, "Why are you so upset? This is amazing. Really, Remus, completely amazing. And here we thought that Bill and Fleur were lucky, but I never expected that you and Tonks could - "

"Arthur," Remus interrupted. "This is not a good thing."

"Oh, Remus, babies are always good things."

"No, you don't understand. I can't have a child."

"Is that what this is all about? What was the argument again? You're too old, too poor, and dangerous for a life like this?"

"No, Arthur…"

"Remus, Molly and I have never had much money, but we always managed to get by. And we were about your age when Ginny came along. Believe me, babies are good things – even if you end up with a Fred or a George," he said with a small laugh. "Or both!"

"Really, Arthur, you don't understand." With difficultly, Remus spelled it out. "It's not mine."

Arthur's smile fell. "What do you mean?"

"Tonks _is_ pregnant," he sighed heavily, "but I'm not the father."

Arthur took a seat opposite from Remus, looking totally bewildered. "How could she be pregnant if you aren't…well that is…"

Remus rubbed his eyes. "Now you see my dilemma."

"No, I don't think I do, unless, " the older wizard chuckled to himself, "unless she had an affair and that's just impossible. I mean…"

Remus met his eyes, confirming that that was indeed the case here.

"She had an affair?" Arthur said in disbelief.

"Well, I don't know the full details, but obviously there is someone else," Remus said, his voice beginning to crack.

Arthur sat back in his chair. "No, I don't believe that. Tonks wouldn't do that."

"Well, believe it, because it's the truth."

"She told you this?"

"Yes, in a way. I … " Remus looked away, finding the truth more difficult to admit verbally than he had thought it would be. "I overheard her talking to him about it. She told him she was pregnant and - "

"Who? Who was she talking to?'

Remus couldn't restrain himself from scowling. "Garcia. Do you know him?"

"Garcia? Oh yes, the one with the unpronounceable first name."

With a nod, Remus said, "Yes, that's _him. _Anaxagoras Garcia. Only Tonks calls him _Zach_." Venom dripping from his voice as he said the name.

"Wait a minute," Arthur said, sitting forward. "You're saying that Tonks and Garcia are having an affair, and now she's pregnant?"

"Exactly."

Arthur gave him a very pointed look. "No, I can't believe that."

"I swear to you, I heard it with my own ears."

"What did you hear? Tell me the exact words."

Remus wet his lips gain, frustrated by having to share the details. "She said that she made a mistake. They spoke of spending the night together, and Garcia even took responsibility for the situation."

"What did she say _exactly_?" Arthur repeated himself.

"She said, 'How do I tell Remus that I'm pregnant and it's not his child?' Her words, not mine."

"Did she say the child was Garcia's? Did she admit to having an affair with _him_?"

"Arthur!" Remus snapped incredulously. "They spent the night together! And if you've ever seen the way he looks at her, the way they are when they're together…"

"Remus, a man and a woman can be just friends. They can even spend an entire evening together without things becoming intimate. Unless you heard her actually admit to having an affair with him, then I'm finding it difficult to believe that she would do something like this."

"She's pregnant!" Remus said rather exasperatedly. "There has to be someone. How could she be pregnant if she hasn't had an affair?"

Arthur looked back sadly, "I don't have a ready answer for that one."

Remus slumped forward, running his hands through his hair, his elbows resting on his knees. "I don't know what to do. I just - " He took a deep breath, trying to keep his emotions in check. "This is why I resisted getting involved with her in the first place."

"Come now, you didn't think she would be disloyal."

Remus looked up at him sadly. "Maybe not intentionally, maybe not so soon, but yes. No matter how much anyone says that it doesn't matter, at the end of the day I'm a werewolf. I knew that at some point, she would realize her mistake in attaching her life to mine. I can't give her the things of the world. And I certainly can't compete with the handsome looks of a young and virile man like Garcia. I'm obviously not giving her…" He took a deep breath. "It's my fault. I'd tricked my mind into thinking I could. She had me nearly convinced that I could, but I see now that I've been deluding myself." Remus closed his eyes, fighting back the tears that threatened to fall. "I couldn't help but believe her. I love her, Arthur."

"And she loves you," his friend replied.

"Apparently not," Remus said, keeping his gaze down.

"I don't believe that, either," Arthur stated pointedly. "I don't know what's going on here, I really don't, but I know - I _know_ that Tonks is in love with you. I think Molly and I knew she loved you even before you did, which is surprising because she's always been so obvious about it. This whole idea of you not being worthy of her, that you can't fulfill her needs is utterly ridiculous. She lights up the moment you enter a room. Her eyes follow you wherever you go. She's always talking about you. How can you even think that she doesn't love you?"

Remus looked up at his friend, "If she loves me so much, then how can you explain the pregnancy?"

"I can't," Arthur replied honestly. "I said I didn't have an explanation, but I'm certain there is one."

"I told you … "

"No, there has to be _another _explanation. Things are not always what they seem, Remus. Just because this appears to be the truth doesn't mean that it is."

Remus shook his head, unable to believe that he had been wrong. "I know what I heard, Arthur. They were her words; she said them herself."

"Listen, do you know how long Molly and I have been married?"

Startled by the question, but knowing that the Weasley's just celebrated an anniversary, Remus answered tentatively. "Thirty years."

"Twenty-nine," corrected Arthur. "And do you know how old Bill is?"

Remus thought for a moment. _Tonks went to Hogwarts with Charlie, which made Bill…_

"Twenty-nine."

Arthur nodded. "Nearly. Molly and I were married in March of 1970. Bill was born in November." He waited a moment while Remus thought over the dates in his head. "Ill save you the trouble and tell you that it's only eight months difference."

"I see," Remus said, looking away uncomfortably.

"No, you don't see. Bill came early. So did Percy, the twins, and Ginny. In fact, Ron was the only one who took the full nine months to get here. Yet, to their dying day, my parents believed that Molly was pregnant when we were married. Now I swear to you, Remus, that wasn't the case. We weren't exactly innocent when we were married, but Molly certainly wasn't pregnant." After a pause, he added, "Things aren't always what they seem."

Remus sat for a moment, mulling Arthur's words over in his head. "What should I do?"

"I think you should get the facts – all the facts - directly from Tonks. Then you make a decision about going forward depending on what she has to say. But Remus, I urge you to approach this with an open mind. Don't go to her in anger."

"But that's what I'm feeling," Remus admitted.

"You have a right to those feelings _if_ what you believe to be true is true. But keep in mind that Tonks really does love you. Of that I have no doubt. She is probably feeling just as anxious and nervous and heart broken over the situation as you are." At that comment Remus shook his head in disagreement.

Arthur didn't wait for him to comment. "And Remus, remember that when it's all said and done, she is pregnant. I'm not sure how much experience you have with the emotional stability of a pregnant woman, but believe me when I say that it's a delicate thing. She's probably not herself right now, and if you're not careful, you may end up doing more damage than you intend to."

"I would never hurt her," Remus said quickly, defending himself against his friends' implication.

"Of course not. Not intentionally. But pregnancy does something to a woman that makes it impossible for her to control the way her emotions affect her. When Molly lost her brothers in the first war with You-Know-Who, it devastated her. She was only four months along or so with Percy when it happened, and we very nearly lost him because she was so distraught. Trust me, there is nothing more frightening that the prospect of losing your own child."

"But this isn't my child, Arthur."

The older wizard pursed his lips. "But it's _Tonks_' child, and I don't think you want to put her though something like that, regardless of what the truth is."

Remus closed his eyes. "No, of course not."

"Just go and talk to her. Really listen to what she has to say. There has to be more to this story than what you overheard. I know it."

"Right," Remus said, swallowing hard. "Thank you, Arthur."

"And will you please let me know how things turn out? Good or bad?"

"Are you sure you want to know?"

"Absolutely. Molly will throw a fit if you don't."

Remus sat up suddenly. "About Molly, can you not tell her just yet? I would rather keep this private for as long as possible. I don't want her worrying about this or making a fuss."

Arthur half smiled. "All right, but know that your are putting me in a hard spot. She's going to want to know what we talked about."

"Tell her it was about the gift," Remus said, standing up and nodding his head toward the washing machine. "And Arthur, thank you again. I only hope you're right about this whole thing."

With that one hopeful thought on his mind, Remus _Disapparated. _


	8. Chapter 8

AN: By the very nature of the situation I have placed these characters in, I am forced to at least acknowledge a few possibilities for them that some of you might find rather controversial. It is not my intention to make this fan fic a statement about any person's decisions that they have or haven't made. I knew I would be diving into these areas when I first began writing this fic and it is for these reasons that I gave the fic an R rating. Mature issues and topics are meant for mature audiences. I only make this clear now because the topic will be discussed here and in later chapters, and I just wanted to make sure everyone was aware of the issues at hand.

**Chapter 8**

22 March 2:47 pm 

For the second time that day, Remus Lupin found himself standing at the entrance to the Ministry of Magic. He looked at the phone contemplating just how he wanted to go about this. It was mind boggling to even be considering something like this, really. Usually he could work out the words he would need in a possibly uncomfortable situation, but this was beyond his experience. This was beyond anything even he could have even imagined.

Deciding that he didn't want Tonks to know he was there just yet, he picked up the phone and asked for admittance by way of The Werewolf Registry. He was an employee, after all, even though he was very seldom called in to the office. Most of his work was done in the field, so to speak. The badge dropped out of the chute and Remus pinned it on with a sigh.

Remus J. Lupin

**WEREWOLF**

UKW 1961-2584

Visiting The Werewolf Registry

With the full moon a little over a week away, the word werewolf glowed a bright red so that no one would mistake his identity. With all the advancements the ministry had made as of late, this was one thing on which they were unwilling to budge.

The booth closed, and a moment later he found himself in the heart of the Ministry of Magic. The wizard who checked his wand eyed him nervously, but Remus didn't give it a second thought. He was far too focused on Tonks and how he was going to broach the topic of her pregnancy to really care what this man thought of him. The wizard placed Remus' wand in a box and stored it under the counter.

Attempting to come up with the best way to start the conversation he needed to have with Tonks, Remus slowly made his way down the hall to the lift and to the second floor.

_How does a man tell the woman he loves that he knows she has been unfaithful? How does a man look that woman in the eye and not crumble from losing her? _

_How can I ever hope to make it through this with my heart intact?_

When the door to the lift opened, he took a steadying breath, willing his heart to stop racing and his emotions to remain calm.

Auror headquarters was relatively busy with the normal sort of activity. Remus scanned the area looking for a glimpse of the pink he had come to love so well. He made his way over to her desk only to find it vacant and appearing as though it hadn't been touched all day.

"Remus? What are you doing here?" It was Mad-Eye Moody, giving that smile that always made his face look more gruesome than it really was.

"I'm looking for Tonks. Do you know where she is?"

Moody's magical eye rested directly on Remus' face. "I assumed she was at home. Told me she wasn't feeling well."

Remus frowned. "No, I don't gather she is feeling well." When Moody looked at him questioningly, Remus added, "I left early this morning for an appointment and didn't see her really. I just thought we might catch a late lunch."

A laugh resonating from the other side of the room caught Remus' attention. He looked up and caught site of Anaxagoras Garcia, looking rather cheerful and talking with ease to a pretty female employee that Remus didn't recognize. It nearly made Remus sick with disgust. It was revolting to think that just a few hours earlier, this man had been told he was going to be a father, and now he was flirting with another woman.

The animal inside of Remus growled.

"Excuse me for a moment," Remus said through clenched teeth. "I need a word with Garcia." He slipped away from Moody before he could protest and strode directly over to stand in front of Garcia.

Garcia's smile faded quickly upon seeing Remus. "Mr. Lupin," he said in a tone that only proved his guilt.

"Where's Tonks?" Remus asked, not even offering the other man the courtesy of a salutation.

The younger wizard blinked. "She is not here. She was ill."

"Yes, I know all about her _illness_," Remus replied dryly.

Garcia looked confused. "She talked with you?"

"No," Remus said, his eyes boring into the other man's worried face. "I overheard your conversation at the Leaky Cauldron today."

"Joder!" Garcia's eyes went wide.

In a voice barley audible Remus added, "I know about the baby."

Garcia wet his lips, looking like an anxious child who had just been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "I think that perhaps it is better that we go somewhere more private. It is important that you and I talk."

Remus nodded and followed the younger man out of the department and down the hall to an empty room. The door closed behind them, leaving them alone with only tension between them. "Well?" Remus said impatiently. "Where is Tonks?".

"Mr. Lupin…mire. I don't know...I should not be the one to speak to you."

Remus just stared as Garcia stumbled over his words like a guilty teenager.

"What you need to understand is…" Garcia ran his hand nervously through his thick hair, and then slammed his hand against the wall. "Dios mio! I told her to tell you."

Remus sighed, "Yes, I heard that part as well. Are you expecting me to thank you for being so courteous?"

"You are placing me in a very awkward position."

Remus gave a cold laugh. "_I_ placed _you_ in an awkward position? I think it's the other way around."

Garcia frowned. "In fairness to Dora, I cannot say more. You must speak to her yourself. "

"Seeing as how she isn't here and you won't tell me where she is, I have no choice except to get the information from you."

"But Mr. Lupin - "

Remus had had enough. "Where is she?" he bellowed.

Garcia swallowed. "She went to Knockturn Alley."

That hadn't been the answer Remus was expecting. "What?"

"There is a woman…a medimalbruja that can help."

"In English please."

"A how do you say, witch doctor?"

"No!" he said with more force. Remus was nearly at a loss for words at what Garcia was implying. _Surely Tonks wouldn't…she couldn't…_

"I know what you must think, but I have used her services before. She can do the spell for Tonks."

Remus felt his heart quicken, his breathing became shallow as he took in the full measure of the situation. The more Garcia tried to explain his reasoning, the more rage Remus felt towards the other man.

"I know that there are risks, but she is very discrete and will not betray a confidence. " Garcia added, having the decency to at least look somewhat affected by what Tonks was doing. "We didn't see any other way."

Remus glared at him, anger boiling inside his heart. "What kind of a man are you?"

Looking puzzled, Garcia asked, "What do you mean?"

"How can you stand there and calmly admit that you sent her off to some _butcher_! Can't you at least take responsibility for your actions? Stand up and face them like a man?"

Garcia shook his head in confusion, "I do not understand. She came to me for help and if there had been any other way - "

"Good God! Do you have any idea what this witch doctor could do to her? I can't even believe that you convinced Tonks to do such a thing! I suppose its evidence of your influence on her. She would never do something like this on her own. I can't believe this whole situation!"

"I only told her once she promised me that she would talk to you. I told her she had to tell you."

"Tell me what?" Remus said angrily, his face very close to Garcia's. "That you were unwilling to face up to your mistake? That you were unwilling to take on the responsibility of your actions? That it would be too difficult – too much of a burden to have a child. So instead of seeing this through, you send her off to some dark arts practitioner to get rid of it!"

"Que horror! Madre de Merlin!"

"What did you say to convince her to do this?"

"I said nothing! She is not going 'to get rid of it!' She's only -"

"Then why did you send her there?"

"To prove the father!"

Remus gave an audible gasp. "You wanted proof? Her word wasn't good enough?"

"She wanted proof. She wanted to know for certain who the father was before she came to you."

It was unbelievable. This man and his audacity were pushing Remus to his limits. "I think it's a bit obvious who the father is." Remus gave him a very pointed look.

Garcia skin paled slightly as he slumped against the wall. "What? You think I…you think that Dora and I - "

"Of course it's you! I heard you admit it!"

"No, Mr. Lupin. You are mistaken."

But Remus didn't hear him. He was too angry, and for the first time in a long time felt the need to strike the man in front of him. Garcia would not get the better of him. If he could keep his anger in check around the likes of Severus Snape, then by God he could control it now. "Just be grateful I don't have my wand! I'm not an imbecile. I've seen the way you look at her. I know you're in love with her!"

Garcia froze. He took a deep breath before saying, "Whatever my feelings are for Dora, I am not the father. I would never do what you are suggesting."

Remus simply glared at him. "And you expect me to believe this?"

"I have never touched Dora in that way. I will admit to being attracted to her. I would hardly be a man if I didn't find her attractive, but there is nothing has passed between us. If she were not married then…perhaps…but"

"That's just it, Garcia. She isn't married." It pained Remus to admit it, but it was the truth. There was nothing legally binding Tonks to him. Just a few spoken promises between two lovers.

"How can you, of all people, say such a thing?" Garcia scowled at Remus. "How can you live with her – love her – and not see how devoted she is to you? I would give all the money in the world to have a woman love me the way Dora loves you."

Remus felt suddenly at war with himself. A battle raged inside his heart telling him that Garcia was right, he was damned convincing in any case. With Garcia swearing that he wasn't having an affair with Tonks, there was only one other possibility, one he hadn't considered. There had to be someone else.

"I'll grant you that Tonks loved me at one time. However, given the fact that she doesn't know who fathered her child only suggests that our relationship isn't everything she had hoped it would be."

"You still think she had an affair?"

Remus gaped at him. "How else could she get pregnant? This isn't some virgin conception, is it? She had to have an affair with somebody!"

"She was raped."

The words hit Remus like ice, sending a chill through his body and making the hair on his neck stand up. It took him a moment to really comprehend what Garcia had said. "What?"

"What did she tell you about Darrius LaMont?"

"The Death Eater?"

"Si."

Remus thought hard, "She didn't say anything about him."

"She never told you that she was attacked?"

He was about to say no when suddenly the memory came to him. "At Valentine's Day…She said her mission didn't go well. That she was hurt, but it just a few bruises. She never mentioned any names, though, and she _certainly_ didn't give the impression that anything that serious had happened." Remus looked at the other man fiercely. "What did he do to her?"

"He drugged her, and when she woke up," Garcia paused, steadying his breath. "When she woke up, her clothes were gone and LaMont was…" He didn't finish the thought. "She told me he didn't rape her. She swore to me that he never fully…"

Remus' blood ran cold at the thought of Tonks being treated in such a way. More than that, he felt guilt for how angry he had been. He loved her, and yet he so readily believed the worst of her. Arthur had been right…there was another explanation. One that left Tonks not only innocent of Remus' reckless accusations, but also a victim of a crime so heinous she didn't even have the strength to share the burden of it with him. She had instead turned to Garcia. And that was more painful for Remus to accept than anything else.

"Dear, God. What have I done?" he said to himself. He met Garcia's eye, feeling ashamed for his accusations and assumptions. "I'm sorry. She didn't tell me."

"Es evidente," came the reply.

"If I'd known about the rape…"

"She swears that it didn't happen that way."

Remus felt another cold chill. "If it never happened, then I'm still left to wonder…you said Tonks needed to prove the paternity of her child before she spoke to me."

"Correct."

"If she swears she wasn't raped…then…" Remus ran a hand through his hair in frustration. "Then…who is the father?"

"You."

Garcia uttered the word with such honesty that for a split second Remus actually considered it possible. "No. I can't have children."

"Por que no?"

Remus closed his eyes and sighed. "I'm sure it hasn't escaped your notice that I'm a werewolf, Garcia."

"And I'm sure it hasn't escaped your notice that Dora is a metamorphmagus. A _shape-shifter_," he said, punctuating the last word.

Remus' heart skipped a beat. "No, it's impossible."

"Los ingleses tan frigidos…sometimes I wish I were back in Espana."

"What?"

"Es possible que los dos nunca hagan el amor?" Garcia muttered, looking up into the heavens. "As I explained to Dora, I think that whatever it is that causes you to transform is similar to what allows her to shape-shift. If that is the case, then it would be possible for you to have a child with her."

"You told her this?"

"Ya entiendes, finally he understands. That is why she wanted to know the truth before she came and told you."

"And she believes this is possible?" It was too wonderful to even consider the prospect.

"She does. At the last full moon, she behaved very strangely. She ate meat – raw meat – like I have never seen her do before. She was tired, nauseous."

"Common signs of pregnancy," Remus said, shaking his head, still not ready to believe.

"And she morphed – or rather she wasn't morphed. She reverted to her natural state without knowing she did it."

It was tempting, but Remus couldn't allow himself to hope it was true. "That doesn't prove the child is mine."

"That is why she went to see Venoma."

"Venoma?"

"Petra Venoma. The witch doctor. She specializes in blood magic."

Remus gave a heavy sigh and leaned back against the wall. "She could get in real trouble for that."

"But is worth the risk, no? Would you rather she wait nine months to see if the baby looks like you?"

Remus thought long and hard about that. If Garcia's theory was correct, it very well could be Remus' baby. However, there was still the chance that the baby could be LaMont's. How would that affect Tonks? What would she do if the test proved she had conceived unwillingly? Would Remus have the courage to accept the child as his own?

A child. Tonks' child. _Their_ child.

A family.

He considered the discussion they had had years ago about the possibility of having a family someday. Tonks had suggested adopting, and what had Remus said? _"Dearest, no one in their right mind would give a baby to a werewolf."_ Maybe this was their chance. Maybe this was fate's way of providing them with the one thing missing in their lives. Remus could accept the baby as his own, and love the child just the same.

If only Tonks could accept it.

"I have to go to her," Remus said more to himself than to Garcia. He headed to the door, eager to find Tonks and set things straight. He was worried what she might do if she discovered that Remus wasn't the father. Even more so, he was desperate to find out for himself if he was the father – if such a dream could come true.

Before he could leave however, Remus needed to make amends with the man he had falsely accused. He turned slowly to Garcia, looking him in the eyes with all sincerity. "I'm sorry, truly I am, for assuming the worst of you. I passed judgment onto you that you didn't deserve, and I know how devastating that can be. My whole life I've lived with people accusing me of doing things and being capable of actions I would never even consider, simply because of the lycanthropy. And now, I have treated you in the same manner. For that, I whole heartedly apologize."

Garcia nodded. "Aceptado. If I had a woman like Dora in my life, I would be suspicious of any man who gave her flowers, no matter how innocent the gesture."

Remus half smiled. "Then shall we call it even?"

Garcia nodded again. "Just promise me that you will tell me whatever the news as soon as possible."

"Certainly. I think I owe you that much. Now, if you'll excuse me, I don't want Tonks to go through this alone."

Once Remus was on the other side of the door, he started down the hall to the lift, his feet picking up speed as he went. It seemed like an eternity, but he managed to ride the lift up to the main hall where his wand was delivered back to him. His heart beat wildly as he traveled back up in the booth to ground level. Desperate to reach Tonks in time, he frantically raced down the street to a location deserted enough for him to _Disapparate_.

SPANISH WORDS:

Joder! - shit

Que horror! Madre de Merlin! – How terrible! Mother of Merlin!

Es evidente – It's evident.

Por que no? – And why not?

Los ingleses tan frigidos – Frigid English couple

Es possible que los dos nunca hagan el amor? – Is it even remotely possible that these two never make love?

Ya entiendes- Finally

Aceptado - Accepted


	9. Chapter 9

AN: Many thanks to the betas Pel and Gryff. Pel actually worked on the fic on the plane while on her way to come visit me! LOL! It was nice to chat one on one – face to face with someone who knows where I'm going with the story. Anyway. I'm sorry for the delay in getting this posted, and I'm afraid it may be a while again before I am ready with the next bit. It's the holidays and life is getting crazy. I hope this will hold you over until the next update. Thanks ever so much for the reviews. You all ROX!

**Chapter 9**

_22 March 4:12 pm_

"I am finished with you," the feminine voice announced. "You may dress now."

Tonks sat up slowly, holding her robe over her chest protectively. "When will you know the results?"

"There is much to examine, but worst is over." Venoma glanced over her shoulder at Tonks. "It will take some time. What you give me is not easy task." Her voice was thick with a foreign accent, and her grammar proved that English wasn't her native tongue, but Tonks hadn't managed to ask where she was from.

"Can I wait here?"

"Yes," her voice hissed, "if you wish." She pointed a long, elegant finger at the front of the establishment. "But please, in other room. I need quiet."

Tonks nodded, slipping her robe around her shoulders and fastening it closed.

Tonks made her way through the beaded doorway, which served as the only barrier between Venoma's lab and the waiting room – if you could call it that. At first glance, Tonks believed the place to be more of a shop than a medical establishment. In the corner sat a large, over stuffed sofa covered in red velvet as well as many decorative pillows. Books, candles, and all sorts of unusual artifacts filled every nook and cranny of the place. Most of the items were for sale and had some sort of medicinal purpose attached to it. The room was heavily scented in potent fragrances ranging from wild flowers to garlic cloves. Soaps, perfume, and lotions were offered, much to Tonks' surprise, and made such promises as wrinkle free skin and an eternal youthful glow.

No wonder Petra Venoma looked the way she did.

When she had first arrived, Tonks was prepared to meet a ragged looking witch with frazzled gray hair, bony hands, and warts. What she found was quite the opposite. Petra Venoma had skin as milky white and smooth as a newborn baby. It was flawless, with just the perfect amount of color at her cheeks. Her chocolate brown hair, which Tonks imagined to be at least waist length, was styled neatly in an elegant twist around her head. Her robes were made of a fine fabric, and jewels and spangles of all sorts covered her neck and wrists. Two long earrings dangled from each ear lobe, giving the illusion that her neck was longer and more slender than it really was. She was quite simply a stunner. Certainly not what Tonks had expected a witch doctor to look like.

She didn't behave the way Tonks had expected either. She was very gentle and had an ease about her that seemed to calm some of Tonks' initial fears. Filled with worry over the possible out come of the situation, Tonks very nearly pretended to need some sort of skin remedy and tried to leave before the witch grew suspicious. However, Venoma saw right though the act and brought Tonks into the back room for an examination. Venoma insisted that it would be simple, but Tonks had a phobia of medical personnel, mostly due to how often she had visited a Healer in her youth due to her clumsiness.

"Paternity is not difficult to determine," Venoma insisted. "If you have blood of the father, it will go quickly."

"I don't have any blood," explained Tonks. "I only have this," she said offering up the vial that contained the bit of hair from LaMont.

"Hum, that is difficult."

"Why?"

"Hair does not make good source for the life line."

"The what?"

The beautiful witch looked deeply into Tonks' eyes. "Within our blood is the life line that determines who we are. It is a combination of two lines – a father and a mother. The line is found in every part of our body; our skin, our bone, and yes, even our hair. But it is easiest to examine the line within the blood." She held up the vial. "Hair is very difficult to work with. Very few lines in the hair."

"But it can be done?" Tonks asked uneasily.

"Certainly. Paternity is not difficult to prove."

Tonks' face flushed slightly. "Actually…er…what if I want to prove that this man _isn't _the father?"

"Not the father?" Venoma repeated, twisting the tube that Tonks had given her in her fingers.

"Well, it might be. That is…I hope it isn't. I need to know, though, before I tell my…my…Well see, there is someone else that I'm hoping is the father and I don't want to say anything to him until I know the truth. That's why I came to you for help."

Venoma squinted at Tonks. "So you like me to prove that this hair is _not _of the father?"

"Yes."

Venoma nodded, looking skeptically at the vial in her hand. "It would be easier if I had a line from man you wish to be father. You have nothing from this other man?"

Tonks scowled, suddenly angry with herself for not stopping at home first and getting a hair from Remus' hairbrush. Why hadn't she thought of that? "No, I'm sorry. I don't have anything else."

Venoma wet her full lips with her tongue. "Then my job will be harder. Just know that I may not provide you with definite answers."

Tonks nodded, hopeful that whatever answers Venoma could provide would be enough.

"Now, disrobe and lie on the table," the foreign witch instructed.

The nervous knot inside Tonks' stomach tightened as she obeyed the direction she was given. Venoma explained how she would retrieve a line from the baby growing within Tonks' womb and assured her that it would be painless, but for some reason Tonks couldn't help but fear for something to go wrong.

She closed her eyes tight and listened to the melodic words chanted by the witch doctor. They were foreign words – a language that sounded mid-eastern in origin. A warm, tingling sensation tickled at Tonks' midsection just below her navel. Her instinct was to cover her stomach with her hand, but Venoma had warned against this, and so Tonks held her hands in tight fists against her sides. It only lasted a moment, but to Tonks it felt like an eternity.

When she opened her eyes, Venoma was holding a small vial of blood. She informed Tonks that everything went well and she could get dressed again. Now all that was left was to wait.

Tonks sat on the squishy sofa with her knees tucked up under her chin like a little child and wrapped her arms around her legs. She closed her eyes and sighed deeply, wishing with all her might that things would work out for the best. She wished for Remus to understand one way or the other. She wished he were here with her right now so that she wouldn't feel so small and alone.

The chime on the door sounded as someone entered the shop. Tonks squeezed her eyes shut tightly, ignoring whoever it was, and buried her face into the crook of her knees. She heard footsteps coming close to her followed by light chuckle.

"You look like a little girl when you sit like that."

Tonks' attention was immediately drawn to the familiar voice. She looked up at him in total surprise, speechless at the sight of him.

"It makes me feel old when you manage to look so young, you know."

"What are you doing here?" she asked tentatively.

"Shouldn't I be the one asking _you _that question?"

She wet her lips and looked away from him, not knowing exactly how to tell him…not sure if she was ready to tell him just yet. However, with him being here…did that mean that he knew? "How did you know I was here?" she asked in a small voice.

Remus took a deep breath and sat down next to her on the sofa. "It seems to me that we are both asking questions that neither one wants to answer." He paused long enough for Tonks to look over at him with a worried expression. "Garcia told me where you were." Her mouth went open in obvious shock. "And before you become angry with him for filling in some of the details, I think you should know that I gave him very little choice in the matter."

"What do you mean?"

"I…well…" Remus ran a nervous hand through his hair. "I overheard your conversation with him at the Leaky Cauldron today. I was in the booth behind yours."

Tonks bit at a fingernail. "So then…you know…I mean…?"

"Yes, I know."

Her chin quivered as she fought back tears. "Oh, God. This wasn't how you were supposed to find out."

"Believe me, Tonks, I would have much rather heard it from you directly. Instead, I overheard parts of a conversation that I didn't fully understand, and because of that I drew some rather upsetting conclusions."

"I don't understand. You heard me say that I was – that I'm – pregnant." It was still difficult to get the word out.

"Yes, I did," he confirmed, his eyes drifting unknowingly to her abdomen. "I also heard you say that it wasn't mine. From the way the rest of the conversation was worded, I made a terrible mistake and assumed that you…and Garcia…"

Tonks frowned at him. "You thought I had an affair?"

Remus nodded solemnly.

Letting her feet fall to the floor in an angry thump, Tonks shifted to face him. "Remus! How could you think that? I would never - "

Remus held up a hand in his defense. "I didn't know about LaMont. You never told me everything that happened that night. With you admitting that it couldn't be mine, I had to assume someone fathered the baby."

"But Zach?" she said incredulously. "How could you ever think that I would do something like that?"

"I heard him say that you two spent a night together. I even heard him admit that this was as much his fault as it was yours. And Tonks, I refuse to believe that you are unaware of his feelings towards you."

"What feelings?"

"Oh come now, Nym, the man is in love with you!"

Tonks gave a gasp of surprise. "He is my friend!"

"He may be just a friend now, but if I weren't in the picture then I'm certain he would be much more."

"But he isn't!" she insisted.

"Yes, I know that now. I readily admit that I made a terrible mistake. However, I would have never jumped to such a conclusion had you told me about LaMont in the first place."

"I didn't think there was anything to worry about! Honest!"

Remus paused a moment. "Still, you should have told me."

"And you should have said something at the Leaky Cauldron today. You should have told me you heard us talking."

"We were both in the wrong," he said softly, taking her hand. "Forgive me. I will never doubt you again."

She met his eyes and tears started to fall down her cheeks. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I didn't want you to know. I was so embarrassed." She curled up next to him, resting her head against his shoulder and tucking her feet under her legs.

Remus wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close to him and planting kisses into her hair. "I love you, Nymphadora Tonks. I love you more than I have ever loved anyone in my entire life. That will never change, no matter how badly a mission goes – how severely you're injured. I think what hurt me the most through all of this was discovering that you had been through something so distressing and traumatic – and you didn't feel comfortable coming to me."

"I'm sorry," she groaned into his shoulder. "I didn't want you to judge me or feel sorry or…any of that. I don't know what I was thinking. I just didn't want you to know I had failed so miserably."

Remus stroked her hair lovingly. "Darling, this wasn't your fault."

"Yes it was. I should have known better. I should have never allowed him to drug me. I was so stupid!" She was crying fully now, which only spurred her anger at herself. She hated crying, and here she was bawling like a baby. "What kind of an Auror am I, anyway? Clumsy is one thing, but this was plain carelessness. I should have gone to a Healer. I should have taken care of things."

"What things?" Remus asked with a hint of worry to his voice.

"I should have found out right then and there if I was pregnant. I swear to you Remus," she said looking up at him with fierce eyes. "I didn't think it happened. I would know, wouldn't I? I would have felt something. I would have noticed _something._"

"Garcia said the same thing. He told me you were convinced LaMont didn't rape you."

Tonks inhaled sharply upon hearing the word. "Two weeks ago I would have told you he didn't…but now…" her arms wrapped around her middle. "It's possible he did. And then when Zach said that he thought it could be yours…" She paused here, wondering if Remus knew about that part. "He did tell you about that, didn't he?"

"Yes, he did. I must say that I'm totally dumbfounded by the very idea."

"But it could be?" she said optimistically

"I don't know," he replied honestly.

Remus watched her closely as she tried to figure out how to put into words what she was feeling. She found herself at a loss. Her emotions were in such a jumbled state of confusion and panic that it was difficult to hold onto what little hope she had that the baby was Remus'. Explaining all of that to him in a way he could understand seemed impossible.

"I don't know what to do," she admitted at last. "I'm so confused by all of this. What I want…and even what I don't want…"

"Meaning the baby?" Remus asked.

More tears fell down her cheek making it nearly impossible for her to hide her desires from him any longer. She felt guilty for even having such thoughts, but they were real and she couldn't deny it any longer. "Yes," she whispered. "I don't know if I can…I can't…"

"Tonks," Remus' voice said in an attempt to lure her out of her thoughts. When she didn't look up at him, he placed a finger under her chin and gently lifted her face. "Nymphadora." She met his eyes and was surprised to be granted with a small smile. "Before we go any further here, there is something that I need you to know."

She swallowed, fearing the worst. The reason she had waited to tell Remus any of this was so that she would be more prepared to face him. If the baby were his, then there would be no cause for alarm. However, there was a great chance that it wasn't his. How would he handle that knowledge? How would their relationship change if Remus weren't the father of the baby she carried? Tonks had imagined several scenarios, all of which ended badly. She even put herself in his shoes. If he had fathered a child with another woman, how would she feel about that?

_But this is different. I didn't do this on purpose. _

She wet her lips and bravely looked into his eyes, waiting for him to explain what was in his heart.

"It worries me to hear you say that you would have taken care of things," Remus said, his voice very low. "The implication there…frightens me. You have every right, of course. If that's what you want, especially once we have all the facts, then I will stand by your decision. However, I need you to know that I love you…and I love everything that comes with you. It's the same way you love me – lycanthropy and all."

Tonks pursed her lips, not daring to believe what he was trying to tell her. "I do love you. I do. But this is different."

"No, just listen. I need to say this, and I think you need to hear it." He took a deep breath as he gathered his thoughts. "You've been mulling this around in your mind for a good while now, I'm sure. Whereas I've only had a short time to consider what's happened, but I'm already feeling some sort of a…I don't even know how to word it. A connection? All I know is that I want a family with you, Nym. Regardless of what these tests prove today, I hope…with all my heart…that you will allow me to be a father to this child."

More tears fell upon hearing this. "That's what I want, too" she cried. "But what if it's not yours?"

"It _is_ mine," he said, taking her hands in his. "It is _mine_."

Tonks bit her lip. "But LaMont - "

"I don't care." He leaned forward. "How many times have you told me that you don't care about the lycanthropy? Well, I don't care about these test results. It's the same thing, Nym."

"Don't you at least want to know the truth?"

Remus smiled. "I admit to having more than a passing curiosity, yes. However, whatever the results, it won't change how I feel right now. I love you," he said, pulling her closer to him. "I want a family. I want to be a father. And I love this child."

She fell against him in a sob. He drew her into his arms, holding her tightly. He kissed her hair near her temple, kissed her cheek, and then found her lips with his. She kissed him back with all the emotion she had inside. It wasn't a fiercely passionate kiss, but it was deep and full of meaning that only they could understand. They stayed there for what seemed like an eternity, pressed together in an embrace.

"I don't mean to interrupt," came the sultry voice of Petra Venoma.

They broke apart, slowly, catching their breath before turning to look at the witch doctor. "Are you finished?" Tonks asked, wiping away a tear from her cheek.

Venoma nodded and gracefully crossed the room. "Unfortunately, I do not have the answers you wish."

Tonks felt her stomach plummet to the floor.

"The sample you give me is not good. There was no root."

"What does that mean?"

Venoma plucked a hair from her own head and signaled for Tonks to take a look at it. "You see the root, that is where I find a life line. The hair you give me had no root. So I could not get a life line for you."

"Oh, I see." Tonks said disappointedly. She looked over at Remus who smiled sadly back at her.

"However the sample I took from your womb," continued Venoma, "I found very interesting."

Both Remus and Tonks turned their attention back to the witch doctor. "Interesting in what way?" asked Remus.

"Tell me, this man you think fathered the child, is he a shifter? Not an animagus. More like a…a…"

"Metamorphmagus?" Tonks finished.

"Yes," Venoma said with an elegant smile.

"No, that would be me. I'm a metamorph."

Venoma laughed. "You should tell me such things before I examine for you. I was confused from what I saw. Now I understand."

"Does that mean the baby is a metamorph?" voiced Remus.

"From what I see, I believe so. Yes." The witch doctor turned away slightly before adding, "I still do not understand sensitivity to moonlight, but no cause for alarm."

An amazed look passed between Remus and Tonks. "Excuse me," Remus said, standing up. "Sensitivity to moonlight…what do you mean by that?"

Venoma seemed confused by the question. "I mean there is sensitivity to moonlight. How else should I say?"

"Is it lycanthropic in nature?"

Venoma shifted her gaze to Tonks. "Are you a werewolf, too?"

"No," Remus said taking a step forward. "But I am."

The witch doctor's blue eyes darted from Tonks back to Remus. "A metamorph and werewolf…now that is interesting." Her eyes narrowed on Remus. "Was it your hair?"

"No, but I'll gladly give you some."

"Blood would be better," she said casually.

Without a moment's pause, Remus pulled up his sleeve and held out his arm to her. Tonks stood up in amazement. Remus seldom showed his skin to anyone, let alone a stranger. His body was scratched and scarred from years of transforming without the aid of Wolfsbane potion. Though his arm wasn't badly injured, the marks on his skin were still obvious.

That wasn't the only reason Remus' reaction had been so surprising to Tonks. Werewolf blood, like that of any dark creature, was considered a precious commodity among those that dealt in the dark arts. There were several dangerous and lethal potions that called for the blood of a werewolf. It was for that reason, as well as some personal ones, that Remus had always been careful with his identity. Yet here he was, freely offering up his blood to a witch doctor who knew the truth about his curse.

"Your hand is all I need," Venoma said with a small laugh. Taking Remus hand, Venoma sliced his palm and let the blood begin to pool.

"Only enough for the test," Remus interjected.

Venoma gave a twisted smile as she turned his hand over and carefully drained it into a vial. With a tap of her wand she sealed the vial and then turned her attention back to the cut on Remus' hand, which she healed quickly and effortlessly. Nodding gratefully at him, Venoma turned on her heal and passed back through the veil of beads that led into her lab.

"You didn't have to do that," Tonks said, taking his hand and tracing a line through his palm.

Remus stared at her. "Yes, I did."

Tonks smiled knowingly and hugged him. "I thought you said you didn't care about the results."

She felt Remus shrug his shoulders, "I lied."


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

_22 March 5:19 pm_

It seemed nearly forever as Tonks and Remus waited for Venoma to work whatever magic was required for her tests. Tonks nearly laughed at Remus and how giddy he was acting, for it was very unlike his character to behave in such a way. They were both giddy, and yet still nervous over the facts the witch doctor had already given them. In an effort to calm his nerves, Tonks pulled Remus to her and kissed him gently. It only lasted briefly until Venoma's voice distracted them at long last.

"Come see," she called to them.

Remus took hold of Tonks' hand as they passed through the beaded doorway. They only took a few steps into the lab when Venoma stopped them. "Wait," she said, pointing a long finger at Remus. "It is not safe for you. You come no further." Venoma rested an elegant hand on top of a device Tonks had never seen before.

"What are you doing?" questioned Tonks, glancing over an unusual device sitting on the table next to the beautiful witch. A metallic stem twisted up from a base made of rock. The bulb at its center was circular, magically suspended in a silver dome, which served as the shade.

"This lamp was a gift from a werewolf hunter. Payment for service I gave him." Her fingers danced over the device. Upon closer inspection, Tonks could see that it was, indeed, a lamp. "Watch," Venoma instructed as she tapped the dome with her wand and muttered an incantation. The bulb lit up and gave off an eerie glow. It wasn't as bright as the electric light some of Tonks' Muggle relations used, but the glow was certainly stronger than that of a candle.

"It simulates light of full moon." Venoma glanced over her shoulder at Remus, who still stood in the doorway. "I doubt it would cause you to transform, but we should be cautious. Now, look here." She picked up a vial and held it up for both of them to see. "This is blood I took from you," she said indicating Remus. Slowly, she brought it to a position under the lamp. The blood in the vial began to bubble as if being boiled on a hot stove. "You see reaction." She said with obvious fascination. "Now see this." She picked up the second vial and held it under the lamp. Tonks held her breath, expecting to see a similar reaction, but it didn't come. The blood in the second vial hardly moved at all, popping only once.

"What does that mean?" Tonks asked.

"I told you there was sensitivity to moonlight, but I would have never suspected lycanthropy. The blood of werewolf is much more potent."

"So where does that leave us?" Tonks sighed, looked back at Remus in uncertainty.

Venoma tapped the lamp and it went dark. She walked slowly towards Remus, her boots clicking on the wooden floor as she went. "The life line I found from your blood is tainted from lycanthropy. It alters human lines into more animalistic lines." She turned back to Tonks. "The line from your womb is similar, but not so animalistic. I can suspect your metamorphic qualities have altered the line, making it more human. But, this is an unusual case, as I said. I give no certainties."

Tonks stepped closer to the witch, feeling a twitch of excitement mixed with nervousness. "What does that mean, then…for the baby?"

"That I cannot answer. I do not know specifics for the child. I cannot tell you if full moon will cause transformations. I cannot tell you if child will be a full metamorph. I have not seen such a child before, so new ground is where we walk. I am sorry not to be more help. But," Venoma paused, pointing a finger at Tonks, "this is not what you came to me for. You came to me for help finding father of child. That question I _can_ answer." She smiled slyly and glanced over at Remus.

Tonks felt as if her heart was beating so fast it would explode any moment. She met Remus' eyes to find his looking totally awestruck. "You're sure?"

Venoma tilted her head to the side and lightly laughed. "Do you make love with another werewolf?"

Tonks laughed though her tears. She fixed her eyes on Remus and said, "No, there's no one else."

In two long strides, Remus crossed to her and embraced her so tightly she though she might break. His arms went around her waist and she felt him lift her off the floor ever so slightly. He kissed her gently and slowly. Tonks wished with all her being that they were at home alone, experiencing these feelings in the privacy of their own bedroom. But that would have to wait.

"I take it you are pleased?"

Remus chuckled into Tonk's hair. "More than pleased."

Tonks leaned back to look up into his eyes with a bright smile. "I love you."

"And I love you." Remus echoed with another kiss.

When the kiss broke, Tonks turned her head to look at the witch doctor and offered her eternal thanks to her for her work.

"No need to thank me. Payment is all I need." She held out a piece of parchment to Tonks.

Tonks sniffed, wiping away some of her tears, and looked at the figure the woman had written on the parchment. Remus looked over her shoulder at the number as well. The giddy feeling in Tonks' stomach vanished almost immediately. The amount of money Venoma was asking for as payment was far more than she had agreed to when she first arrived.

"I'm sorry, I thought it was less than this," Tonks said.

"Yes, that was for one test, but I did two," the woman said matter-of-factly.

"Oh…I see…"

"Is there problem?" Venoma asked.

"I don't have this kind of money," Tonks admitted with a glance up at Remus.

"Not worry," Venoma said airily. "We make arrangement. One more of these and we call it even." She held up the vial containing the blood she had so easily taken from Remus.

The air in the room was suddenly so thick it could be cut with a knife. Tonks felt Remus stiffen beside her. To her surprise he asked, "For what reason would you need one, let alone two vials of my blood?"

The other witch gave a sly smile and opened the cabinet she was standing next to. "You think it comes easy looking so young?" Her eyes darted to Tonks. "You are blessed. You will never know how it is not to stop your body from aging. That you control. I, however, cannot. I use potions and creams and anything to help turn back time." She pulled out a glass jar filled with some sort of milky white substance. "My personal concoction. Stronger than the ones I sell." she said eyeing the jar with great affection. "Only one left. It will last another year, and then I must find substitute."

"What is it?" Remus asked.

"You think I give up my secret so easily?" she said with raised eyebrows. "I sell similar mixture, but leave out one important and rare ingredient."

"Werewolf blood," Tonks said under her breath.

"It gives my skin a glow like no other. A firm sign of youth." She held her chin up in such a way that Tonks couldn't help but admire her beauty. "What you give me, I will make enough for years to come."

Remus eyed her skeptically. "How do I know you won't use it in a lethal potion?"

Venoma tossed her head back in laughter. "You think I give up my beauty to kill someone? I assure you, I have other means of taking revenge, should I need to."

Remus looked down at Tonks questioningly. She couldn't believe he was even considering it. "Don't," she said.

"How else can we pay her?" His voice dropped to an almost inaudible level. "Keep in mind that she knows you're pregnant. I don't know about you, but I don't especially want a witch doctor angry with either one of us right now."

Out of an unknown instinct, Tonks' hand flew to cover her abdomen protectively. "Do you trust her that much to give her your blood?"

Remus smirked and turned to face the other woman in the room. "I'll give you want you want…on one condition." Venoma nodded. "I want to be present when you make the mixture. I don't have any interest in the other ingredients, so I promise you that I won't take notes or give your secrets away. I only want to see that you keep to your word and use only what you need."

She clearly didn't like his condition. "It would be easier to just give me what I want."

"Yes it would, however I can't, in good conscious, do that. If you really want my help, you'll allow me to watch until I am satisfied you won't use the blood for any other potion."

The woman considered the offer, clearly torn between her desire to stay young and the need to keep her recipes a secret. Her beauty won and she handed Remus a parchment and quill. "You sign agreement to be here two weeks from today. I make mixture, you watch." She didn't sound pleased with the arrangement in the slightest.

Remus went to sign the parchment, but Tonks stopped him, grabbing his arm and holding him back. "Are you sure about this?" she said under her breath. "You're about to sign a contract with a witch doctor."

Remus gave her a solid look. " I really don't think we have much of a choice. I'll be careful when I come to fulfill the contract." He ran the quill over the parchment, closing the deal with his signature.

Venoma gave a haunting smile as she rolled the parchment up and placed it among her other papers. "Is done then." Her eyes darted from one face to the other. "You enjoy your evening." She bowed slightly and raised her hand, directing then to the door.

Once outside, Tonks couldn't help but consider the odd sensations passing through her. She looked up at Remus, who seemed to be having similar feelings. It was indescribable really. Happiness over the outcome, mixed in with worry of the unknown, not to mention the relief that all the misunderstandings had been put to rest. She felt drained emotionally from the upheaval of the previous week. Remus must have sensed this in her, for he wrapped his arms around her and held her steadily against his chest.

"Shall we go home?" he asked quietly.

She nodded. "I'm tired."

"I don't doubt it. Let's find a floo."

"Floo?" she asked, leaning back to look at him with a puzzled expression.

"You shouldn't _Apparate_ in your condition," he explained.

"I'm just tired."

Remus smiled. "I meant…concerning the baby…"

Tonks bit at her lower lip. "Oh…yeah. But I've been _Apparating_ all over the place. Once more couldn't hurt?"

"If it's all the same to you, I'd like to begin my role as the over protective father by insisting on finding a floo."

Tonks couldn't hold back the smile that lit her face at hearing the word "father" come from him with such ease. She agreed and they made their way back to the normalcy of Diagon Alley where they could floo safely back to the comfort of their own flat.

It was so odd to be standing there, in their home, as if nothing much had happened over the day. Tonks wasn't sure how to behave or what to say, as she had never been in a situation like this. What's the correct method for ending a day that had just changed your life forever in the most amazing way? Her eyes met Remus' again, and she was comforted to see that he, too, seemed to be at a loss for how to proceed.

"It feels strange, doesn't it?" she muttered, breaking the silence of the room.

"But a good kind of strange. Strange and unbelievable," he added, stepping closer to her.

Tonks shrugged. "I'm not sure what to do."

"I know. I feel as if the world has been altered, and yet I look around and I don't see any noticeable changes."

"Exactly! Everything feels different. Shouldn't something look different?"

He brushed her fringe back out of her eyes and cupped her face with his hands. "Give it a few months and _something_ will look different."

She smirked at him. "Ta."

He kissed her then, softly and lovingly, as if offering thanks for the miracle growing within her. His mouth lingered against hers as he murmured a quiet, "I love you."

Breaking away, and feeling more lightheaded than she had all day, Tonks reminded him that she was tired. "I think I'll go lie down for a bit."

"Are you hungry?"

"A little, but I'm more tired than anything."

"You go and have a rest and I'll make up something to eat," he offered.

"Sounds good. But don't stay away too long."

In a matter of moments, Tonks had managed to change into her nightclothes, pull herself into bed, and fall into a comfortable sleep. She wasn't even aware of how much time had passed between crawling into the bed and being awoken by the gentle nudge on her shoulder. She blinked open her eyes to find Remus smiling down at her.

"Wotcher, Remus," she said sleepily, yawning and stretching out her long arms over her head.

"It should be a crime that you can fall asleep so quickly."

"I told you I was tired."

"I know, and I almost let you alone, but reconsidered it when I took into account that you hadn't eaten anything all day." He nodded over to the tray of food perched on the nightstand.

Tonks rolled her eyes. "I skip meals all the time."

"I know that as well, and I'm sorry but you're not going to get away with it anymore. You need to eat." His hand caressed her abdomen protectively.

"Are you going to keep this up for the whole nine months?"

"That's my plan," he said with a wink.

A smile tugged at the corners of her mouth. "Fine. I'll eat."

Tonks made well on her word and finished off the sandwich Remus had prepared for her. She was even relatively surprised to find that the slightly nauseous feeling that had plagued her almost all day vanished more with each bite. With her stomach settled and her mind at ease, Tonks nestled back under the covers contentedly. It was only upon seeing Remus begin to leave that she felt herself frown.

"What's wrong?" Remus asked, taking in the unhappy face she was making.

"Aren't you going to stay with me?"

"Yes, of course. I'm just not very tired right now. In fact, I'm quite the opposite really."

Tonks tugged on the sleeve of his robe. "You don't have to sleep, you know. You can just lie here with me."

Remus cocked an eyebrow at her.

"You may be wide awake, but I assure you that I am too tired for anything else. Please, Remus, I just want to be with you. I want you to stay."

"How can I possibly resist you?"

Tonks grinned madly as he pulled off his robe and slipped into bed next to her, wrapping his arms around her in the process and planting a loving kiss in her hair. She snuggled up next to him, entwining her legs with his and resting her arm over his hip.

This was exactly what she had wanted – what she had always wanted from him. It was this feeling – this moment that should last them forever. Yet she had almost lost this, and it suddenly gripped at her heart that both of them had so foolishly jumped to conclusion about each other. Conclusions that were so unnerving it sent a chill down her spine. It wouldn't do. A change had to be made.

"Remus," she murmured into his shoulder.

"Yes, love?" he replied running an affectionate hand up and down her back.

"Will you do something for me?"

"Anything. I'm at your mercy tonight."

"Will you marry me?"

The hand tracing her spine stopped and she felt Remus tense up at her question.

"Nym…" he began tentatively.

"Just listen to me for a sec," she said, pushing away just enough to look into his perplexed face. "I don't like how we handled things today. We both made hasty and potentially damaging assumptions today that should never have even crossed our minds. I don't like keeping secrets and I don't like that you still worry I might up and leave you some day."

"But Tonks - "

"I'm not finished," she interrupted gently. "I don't want there to be any doubts between us ever again. I want stability and commitment and all that jazz that comes with it."

"You don't think I'm committed to you?"

"I don't think you feel _I'm_ totally committed to _you_, and I want to remedy that as soon as possible."

Remus' face resembled that of a scolded child. "I can't say how sorry I am for that, can I? But marriage, Tonks? We can't. It's impossible."

"No it's not, you just refuse to see the possibility. I want to stand next to you in front of all our friends and family and anyone that gives a damn about us and make it publicly known that I love you and chose to spend the rest of my life loving you. I want to make it official that my life is your life, and what hurts you hurts me. I want to be able to call you my husband and never have to second-guess the use of the term. If you'd let me, I would shout it from the roof tops just to make sure the whole world was aware of how much I love you."

Remus sighed and searched her face with his eyes. "But…legally…"

"I don't give a rat's ass about that. If you need a piece of parchment as proof of my devotion, then I'll have something worked up for you. I'll sign whatever you need me to sign."

Remus smiled slightly and closed his eyes in disbelief.

"Besides," Tonks added, "it might sound old fashioned, but I don't want our baby born out of wedlock."

Looking back into her eyes, Remus agreed. "No, it's not old fashioned. You're right about that."

Tonks pressed closer to him. "I want everyone to know this is your baby, complete with the last name of Lupin to prove the point."

Remus chuckled. "You marry me and the baby won't be the only one with the last name of Lupin…_Tonks_," he said emphasizing her name in the process.

"True."

"You'd have to start letting people use your first name."

"Why? Lupin is a perfectly acceptable name. I might even hyphenate my last name, you never know."

"Nymphadora Tonks-Lupin?" he said with a chuckle.

"I like the sound of it." She leaned in for a kiss.

"So do I," he said, returning the favor.


	11. Chapter 11

_AN: Sorry for the delay in getting this posted. I've been distracted by a massive plot bunny for H/G for the last few weeks and R/T took a back seat. I've got things going now and am back on track. Hope this was worth the wait. _

**Chapter 11**

_15 April, 5:08 pm_

Standing in front of the full-length mirror, Tonks adjusted her clothing for what seemed like the hundredth time. She turned to the side, checking and double-checking the way her shirt fell over her mid section. She held her shoulders just so, hoping to distract from the fullness her breasts had recently taken on. Satisfied, she tugged on her jeans a bit, pulling them higher up on her hips, which was difficult considering she barely had hips anymore. Unfortunately, tugging them up more than they were made to go and sucking in her tummy as much as she could only emphasized the size of her bosom. With a heavy sigh she expelled her breath, slouching her shoulders forward in defeat.

"Are you almost ready to go? We're running a bit late as it is." Remus said, entering the bedroom.

Tonks frowned at her reflection, tugging yet again on the hem of her t-shirt. "It doesn't look right."

"Nym, you look fine."

"It's the bump," she said, pulling on the waist of her jeans again.

"I've told you, there isn't a bump yet," Remus said, stepping up to her and examining her more closely.

"Yes there is!" she gaped at him, pulling her shirt up for him to see the way her tummy curved ever so slightly.

Remus smiled. "That isn't a bump, love. It's more like a…large dinner."

Tonks gave him an exasperated look. "Thanks."

Chuckling, Remus slipped his arms around her from behind, letting his hands rest gently on her abdomen. "Why are you worried about it anyway? I thought you said you didn't mind getting a bump."

"For the most part, no," she confirmed, placing her hands over his. "But my clothes don't exactly fit right and it's just…obvious. If it was just the bump, it might be okay, but it's not. I mean, look at my breasts."

Remus smirked. "Perfect pair it seems to me. I don't see anything wrong with them."

"No, of course you wouldn't." She looked back at her reflection. "They look like an engorgio charm went bad."

Remus laughed, "So?"

Tonks turned in his arms. "So, they're going to notice."

"You're a metamorph. No one will think twice about you looking slightly different."

"Yes they will and then they'll know, Remus. I don't normally go around 'enhancing' bits of me. At least not since I was fourteen."

"Considering that we were going to tell them anyway, I don't see the problem."

"They'll take one look at me and know, and I don't want them to just know. I want to tell them myself." She broke away and resumed fussing with her clothes.

"Then wear a bigger shirt," Remus offered.

Tonks grimaced.

"All right, then wear some robes."

"Oh yeah, because me showing up at a casual dinner wearing traditional robes wouldn't be a dead give away that something is going on."

Remus sighed in frustration, slumping back against the bed. "What is it you want me to do about this, Nym? It was your idea that we wait a few weeks to tell everyone about the baby. So we've waited a few weeks and now you've got…" he signaled to her tummy.

"A bump," Tonks said running her hand over it.

"A paunch," Remus corrected.

"And big tits," she added.

Remus cocked his head. "Slightly, but even though I swear to you that you don't look pregnant, you won't take my word for it."

"You look at me every day. The change was gradual for you. But for my mum…or Molly…they are going to spot it right away."

Remus covered his eyes with his hands. "You honestly don't look pregnant!" He stood up and went to her. "Listen, if you had this enormous bump that you are insisting is so noticeable, would you be able to button your jeans?"

Tonks shifted her weight. "Well, they don't fit right. At least not like they used to."

Remus only raised his brows in reply.

"You _swear_ it isn't noticeable?"

Placing one hand over his heart and raising the other one as if taking an oath Remus said, "I solemnly swear that you are as beautiful as ever."

Tonks shook her head at him. "All right then, but if this backfires, I'm blaming it on you."

"I gladly take full responsibility for your pregnancy, although it does take two to tango." His brows waggled in suggestion.

"Men," Tonks mumbled, swatting at his arm. "Now go and get our cloaks."

_5:19 pm that same night_

Remus knocked on the door to the Burrow, giving Tonks another chance to make a final adjustment to her jeans.

"Stop it," Remus said without even looking at her. "If you keep fidgeting with your clothes then they will suspect."

The door opened before Tonks could get in a retort. Molly greeted them with a bright grin. She shuffled them in, instructing her husband to take their cloaks. Remus handed them off to Arthur taking a moment to pull him aside and ask the necessary question. Tonks forced a casual smile as she tried to listen to the hushed conversation behind her.

"Are Ted and Andromeda here?"

"Oh yes. Arrived about ten minutes ago. You're late, by the way," Arthur scolded.

"Yes well…" Remus mumbled something Tonks couldn't quite make out, but she was certain it had something to do with the fuss she had made over the clothes. "So you haven't told anyone, then?"

"No, no. I promise you, I didn't tell anyone."

"Good. She wants to make sure this is done properly."

"And you really haven't said anything to her parents? You've never spoken to Ted even…about…"

Tonks heard Remus groan. "No, I haven't, and thanks for making me fully nervous now."

Arthur laughed and patted him on the back before walking away to hang up the cloaks.

Remus stepped up next to her stiffly. "You know, I really should speak to your father before we make any kind of announcement."

"Why? It's not like he can very well say no."

Remus' gaze shifted down to her. "Oh, yes he can!"

Tonks tutted and rolled her eyes at the very idea. "We live together, Remus. I'm sure everyone, including my parents, knows what we get up to. Getting married," she said rather quietly, "won't be much different."

"It's his reaction to the bump that I'm more concerned about."

Her eyes went wide. "You said it wasn't a bump!"

"Ssshhhh," he insisted as Andromeda approached them.

"Nymphadora! There you are!" her mother said, hugging her. "I wondered if you would be here tonight. You've been hiding from me for the last few weeks."

Tonks smiled, trying to play it off. "I wasn't hiding, I've just been…busy."

Andromeda hummed skeptically and brushed her long hair away from her face to get a better look at her daughter. "I like that shirt," she said gently placing a hand on Tonks' shoulder. "But darling, don't you think it's a bit snug? Or are you intentionally trying to emphasize your curves?" She chuckled to herself as Tonks' cheeks blushed to match her hair color. "You know," Andromeda continued, "you already caught Remus. You don't need to keep up the act unless…" her focus shifted to Remus, "unless he insists." She patted his arm casually. "And how have you been, Remus?"

Remus' face was just as flushed as Tonks' was. "I'm very well, thank you. And how is Ted?"

Andromeda frowned. "Very well, thank you? Why so formal all of a sudden?"

"Oh, I…I…well…"

"And stuttering too?" Andromeda laughed. "The way you two are behaving is just so odd. Makes me think you're up to something, and knowing the both of you, that isn't a good sign."

"We're not up to anything," Tonks assured. "We're just…here for dinner. I'm starving."

Her mother raised an eyebrow.

"I skipped lunch."

"You did?" Remus said, looking down at her in surprise.

Tonks held a smile on her face, hoping that Remus would just let it go this once. She hadn't skipped lunch, but she couldn't very well explain to her mother that she'd been eating like a horse for days now without giving up their surprise.

Hoping to avoid any more uncomfortable conversation, Tonks pulled on Remus' arm saying she really wanted to go find something to drink. Remus followed suit, making polite excuses to Andromeda as the left.

"That was close," she said under her breath.

"Tell me about it. I could really use a drink."

"So could I," Tonks teased, knowing full well that she wasn't able to consume alcohol in her current condition. She wasn't taking any chances with this pregnancy, so even a butterbeer wasn't an option.

To her chagrin, they encountered the whole clan of younger Weasley's helping themselves to the assorted off-limits items at the beverage table.

"Remus…Tonks! If memory serves me correctly it's red wine and firewhiskey?" Fred asked, holding up some glasses to them. "Ron brought along some of Old Ogden's finest."

Tonks cleared her throat. "I think I'll stick with water tonight."

"Water?" George grimaced. "It's a party, Tonks. You can't make a toast with water."

Immediately, her eyes went wide. "Toast, who said anything about a toast?"

Ginny elbowed him in the side. "Nice going," she muttered.

"No worries, Gin," George said.

Fred smiled brightly and stood between Ginny and her fiancée, Harry, with his arms draped over their shoulders. "You see, Harry and Ginny here have a bit of an announcement to make."

"You do?" Tonks said.

"We do?" Harry asked, looking at Ginny. "Oh right, we do," he replied when she scowled at him. Harry looked around the room. "Now? Should I do it now?"

"Yeah, let's get this over with," George said before calling out to the room. "Hear ye, hear ye. My lovely sister and her dashing fiancée would like to say a few words."

The room quieted down and all eyes were on Harry and Ginny. Harry took Ginny's hand with a smile. "Gin and I just wanted everyone to know that…" Harry paused and Tonks could feel her stomach churn at the possibilities. "We found a house!" Harry finished to a room full of congratulations and well wishes.

"It's in Hogsmeade and it's absolutely delightful," Ginny added.

"Of course, you won't be moving in until after you're married," Molly Weasley said pointedly from across the room.

Ginny rolled her eyes in protest. "Harry's going to live there, and I'll move in after the wedding."

Tonks blushed crimson at the comment. Remus took her hand as a source of comfort and murmured in her ear, "Don't even think about it."

"Think about what?"

"Our situation is totally different from theirs, so whatever you're thinking, I insist that you stop it."

"I'm thinking…that we should make an announcement of our own."

Remus grinned madly at her. "Certainly." He turned and anxiously looked over the faces of everyone in the room, his eyes lingering on Ted and Andromeda. "Since we're all in the mood for announcements, Tonks and I have one of our own."

"Yeah, Fred and I do, too," George interrupted, stealing focus.

"That's right," Fred said. "Business has gone through the roof."

"And we've got more demand now than ever."

"So, we've decided that now is the perfect time to expand."

"And we don't just mean another store. We mean we're going international."

More cheers and congratulations were offered to the twins. "That's…incredible,  
Remus stammered, trying to offer his own praise. "Fred, George, you must be - "

Before he could even get a word in edgewise, Ron came forward with news of his own.

"Seems like the whole family has some good news tonight. Far be it from me to be the one left out." He smiled from ear to ear. "I made the team. You're looking at the newest Chaser _and_ assistant captain for the Chudley Cannons."

At this, everyone in the room, except for Tonks and Remus, roared loudly in total delight. Hermione planted a kiss on Ron's mouth that made him go scarlet. Tonks felt as if she were sinking into the floor, and it didn't take much to see that Remus was forcing his grin. They both looked at each other in disbelief.

"It's just so wonderful," Molly said, beaming at her family. "Everyone's doing so well. And with Arthur…oh dear…do you want to tell them or shall I?"

Tonks couldn't imagine what was coming next. She leaned over to Remus. "If he's been made Minister of Magic, I very well may vomit."

Arthur happily looked around the room. "I can't be outdone by my own children, now can I. I, too, have had a bit of luck at work and got a promotion to be the liaison officer to the Muggle Prime Minister."

Sounds of happiness filled the room as once again Tonks and Remus tried to look as delighted as everyone else. It wasn't that they weren't happy for the Weasley's. If anyone deserved good fortune, it was their family. But tonight was supposed to be a big night for Tonks and Remus. As it was, it was turning out to be a big night for _everyone_, which almost made their own news seem less significant.

Tonks felt her legs go a bit weak and she sunk down into the sofa. Remus followed her. "Do you still want me to say something?" he asked.

Before she could give him answer, her father's voice broke through. "Didn't you have something to say, Remus? You said you and Nymphadora had an announcement."

Remus looked up. "Yes, we did. We do. That is…" He looked at Tonks expectantly.

Tonks waved a hand through the air. "Oh, bugger! What the hell. I'm pregnant and we're going to get married."

The news was met with silence.

"Is that all?" Andromeda Tonks said. "That's old news. We've known about that for almost two weeks now, haven't we, Ted?"

"Yes, we have," he agreed. "Any other news?"

Tonks' eyes went wide. "You knew? How did you know?"

"Well, Molly told us," her mother said.

"Molly?" Tonks said.

"Arthur, you promised you wouldn't tell her!" Remus said.

"I didn't say a word to Molly, I swear."

"Then how…?"

"That handsome, young chap that you work with at the Ministry," Molly explained. "He told me."

"Zach? But I told him not to say anything outside of work."

"And he didn't. I over heard him talking to Arthur about it when I came to visit him for lunch one day. I was in the building, so technically it wasn't outside of work."

"But that's not what I meant," Tonks said, exasperated. She searched the faces of everyone in the room. "So this whole time…you've known. We've been trying to keep it a secret and you…you all knew?"

Beside her, Remus gave a chuckle. "I think we've been had." He smiled brightly. "I'm going to take a wild guess that Arthur didn't get a promotion."

"Not at all," the older wizard said. "Even if I did, I wouldn't accept that position. I love Muggle articles, not Muggle politicians."

"And the Cannons haven't held tryouts yet, so there is no way I could have made the team," Ron said, quickly adding, "But I am going to try."

George chimed in next. "Fred and I are thinking of expanding - "

"But not internationally," finished his twin.

"Which brings us to Harry and Ginny," Remus said.

"Oh well…we really did find a house," the bespectacled young man said.

"That's what got this whole things started," Ginny added. "We knew you two were going to make an announcement and we didn't want to steal the spot light."

"But Ron thought it would be funny if we all had something to say," said Hermione.

"And you know Fred and me," said George.

"We can't resist a joke," said Fred.

Tonks looked over to her mother. "And the conversation at the door?"

Andromeda smiled. "You and I really should set aside some time to go shopping."

"But," Tonks said, her eyes looking a bit watery, "aren't you at least a bit happy for us?"

"Happy? I'm ecstatic!" Andromeda said excitedly, pulling Tonks to her feet and hugging her tightly.

The next thing Tonks knew, she was surrounded by her friends and family, offering hugs and laughing in delight. Relief settled in her stomach at last as one by one everyone congratulated her and Remus. Tears of joy fell down her cheeks as her eyes met Remus'. It wasn't the way she had planned on sharing her news, but now that everything was out in the open, she couldn't imagine a better way for things to have transpired.

_6:47 that same evening_

Remus smiled to himself as he watched Tonks discuss her plans for the upcoming ceremony with the other ladies at the dinner party. It had been a while since he had seen her as animated and excited as she was right now, and he couldn't help but consider how beautiful she looked as she spoke. Her mouth moving rapidly as her hands waved through the air. A laugh escaped from her at some comment Ginny made. It was music to his ears.

"Oh dear," the voice of Ted Tonks sounded next to him, bringing him out of his daze. "Looks to me as if she's going to have you in dress robes in no time."

Remus looked over at the man beside him, the man he was most nervous about facing tonight. "If that's what she wants."

"Andromeda and I eloped. It's far easier that way." He crossed his arms and leaned against the wall.

"So long as she doesn't have me in jeans with holes in the knees and some kind of leather jacket that's totally not my style."

Ted shook his head. "I doubt it. If Nymphadora had wanted someone with that sort of style, I don't think she would have fought so hard for your attention a few years ago."

Remus glanced at him in surprise. "Point taken." He paused waiting for the other man to comment. When none came, Remus said, "Still, I never know what she'll come up with next. She pierced her ear again a while back and I half expected her to try to pierce my own."

"No, she tried that with Sirius once, and it backfired."

"That was Tonks?" Remus said in surprise.

Ted smiled. "Did you know about it?"

"I knew he'd got his ear pierced because he wouldn't stop complaining about how much it hurt. However, he told us that he had been enchanted by some beautiful young witch that he'd spent the weekend with."

"Well, that's mostly true. He did spend a weekend with us shortly after he left Hogwarts, and Nymphadora insisted that he get his ear pierced when she did. Now, I might be biased, but I think she's rather beautiful."

Remus looked over at Tonks and smiled. "Yes, she is, but then I'm biased, too."

"That you are. Of course, when she tricked Sirius into getting his ear pierced she was only five…six maybe."

Remus groaned. "Don't remind me. It's bad enough…"

"What's bad enough?" Ted prodded.

Remus took a deep breath. He'd never really had a deep conversation with Ted or Andromeda about his relationship with their daughter. There had been opportunities over the years, but Remus had always somehow managed to avoid addressing the issues. Now, he wanted Ted to know that he recognized the age difference between them and the fact that there were risks involved with his lycanthropy. It was very important to Remus that Ted understood he didn't look upon the facts lightly.

"When I first saw Tonks at Grimmauld place all those years ago, I was totally stunned," he admitted quietly. "Sirius had told me that his cousin was part of the Order, but I brushed it off. I had difficulty imagining it. After all, I can remember when she was born."

"You can?" Ted asked.

"Oh yes. Andromeda sent Sirius a parcel with an announcement and all sorts of photos of her. The pictures even had a place of honor on top of a pile of papers next to his bed for quite some time. I'm not sure if that was because of his inability to clean up or if he really did like them, but there they sat. So I was thinking how odd it was that this little girl could be a member of the Order. And then when I saw her," he paused as he remembered. "She took my breath away."

"The Spring before Sirius died," Ted said, breaking the silence that had passed between them, "Nymphadora had dinner with us and she spent the whole night talking about you. Andie said, as a joke mind you, 'Sounds to me like you're in love with him.' Nym didn't say anything. She just shrugged, and I thought…oh…God."

Remus felt pale and swallowed hard.

"I couldn't believe what I was hearing. All I could think about was that I could remember when you were sorted."

"You can?"

"Yes. Well, not you specifically, but I remember that sorting because it was when Sirius was placed in Gryffindor. Talk about an upset. I had been with Andie for a year or so by then, and I had heard all sorts of stories about Sirius. The Blacks weren't the only ones surprised by his sorting, you know."

"True."

"So when my daughter came to me saying that she was falling in love with a man who was the same age as Sirius, I was dumbfounded. I mean, you and me," he said pointing to Remus, "technically, we were at Hogwarts together. That's just…it's just…"

"Unfathomable," Remus offered.

Ted shook his head.

"Unthinkable?"

Ted frowned.

"Impossible?"

"No, actually Remus I was shooting for just plain weird."

Remus chuckled, "Not exactly what you were wanting for your daughter, especially considering the lycanthropy."

"I would be lying if I said I wasn't concerned."

Having never spoken of these things with Ted, Remus was rapidly feeling more distraught and uneasy about the whole situation. He hoped to be able to smooth things over and make some amends. "Listen…Ted…I need you to know that I have always had the best intentions when it comes to Nymphadora. I struggled with my own feelings for so long and tried to resist giving in to her. She fought me so hard, I don't think that anyone can - "

"Remus," Ted said, holding a hand up to stop him from going further. "I know all of that. I know that you held back and even pushed her away. She spent a few nights crying on my shoulder over you, after all."

Remus sighed and looked down at a spot on the floor. "I'm sorry about that."

"Don't be sorry. It was because of that whole messy situation that I was able to accept the two of you as a couple."

"Really?"

"Absolutely." Ted looked directly into Remus' eyes. "I'm the father of a metamorphmagus – a woman who can change her appearance to whatever she or her partner would like. On more than one occasion I have been worried by the thought that a man would take advantage of her talents. It was my greatest fear that she would end up with a man who only wanted to be with her for what her gifts could offer him, rather than for who she really was. After about the third conversation I had with her about how you were still unwilling to have a relationship with her – that you felt she could do better for herself – I stopped advising her to move on and look elsewhere and started encouraging her."

Remus was very nearly speechless upon hearing this news. It wasn't something he ever expected to hear from anyone, let alone Tonks' father. He wet his lips and found his voice after a good while. "Thank you for telling me that. I know I've never asked you…for permission…"

Ted stifled a howling laugh. "Permission? Oh Remus, that's good."

Remus smiled. "Well, all things considered, I should have had the courtesy to at least ask you."

"Then ask me, if it means that much to you."

Remus held his breath for a moment, unable to believe the words he was readying himself to say. "May I please marry your daughter?"

With a raised eyebrow, Ted said, "No." He swatted at Remus' arm in the next second. "Of course you can marry her. Good God. It's not even my permission you need. It's hers," he said, indicating Tonks on the other side of the room. "And given tonight's announcement, I think you already have that."

Remus could hardly move, having been scared out of his wits for that brief, but agonizing moment.

"You really thought I was going to say no, didn't you," Ted laughed. "Remus, if Andie and I honestly opposed your relationship with Nymphadora, we would have said something when you two moved in together. I mean, have you ever known Andromeda to be subtle or quiet about her opinion?"

Feeling slightly more at ease, Remus said, "No. I haven't."

"Well, there you go. But you do have to promise me something."

"Anything I can do."

"Don't ever call me 'Dad'."


	12. Chapter 12

_AN: I figured out that I never posted this here. I feel really badly for it and need to apologize for keeping anyone waiting. I didn't mean to do that. I give my heart felt thanks to my beta's for removing some of the sugar in my fluffy concoction. However, if you are diabetic, you may want to be careful as this chapter still contains quite a bit of sweet goo._

**Chapter 12**

10 May 5:33 pm

For what seemed like the hundredth time in the last hour, Remus checked the clock on the wall with the expectation of seeing the time read two o'clock. As it was, he still had nearly a half hour of unbearable waiting to go before he would be allowed to see the one person he most wanted to see. This whole idea of not permitting the groom to see the bride before the wedding had to be the most ridiculous superstition he had ever heard of. All it seemed to accomplish, in Remus' opinion, was to create unnecessary nervous tension in the mind of the groom, as if he wasn't worried enough about remembering the words of the ceremony or stressed over keeping his new dress robes from getting wrinkled or mussed in anyway.

It only added to his apprehension that he hadn't seen or heard from Tonks in over twenty-four hours. She left their apartment yesterday morning to go and stay with her parents. Correction, Molly and Andromeda arrived and literally pulled Tonks out of the apartment against her will. He'd received an owl from Andromeda later that afternoon assuring him that his intended was well taken care of in spite of the fuss she was making over being locked away from him. He'd even tried to Apparate into her room last night to wish her sweet dreams, but had nearly been splinched when he came up against the apparition ward that had been placed around the house in case such an attempt should be made. Needless to say, Remus had been sent back to the apartment in total embarrassment without so much as a word from his fiancée.

Now here he was, pacing nervously around the spare bedroom of the Tonks' home, checking and rechecking his appearance in the mirror and willing his heart to stop thudding in his chest. The well tailored, dark blue robes that had been so comfortable in the shop were becoming increasingly stuffy, and Remus fingered his collar in an attempt to loosen it.

"You look smashing!" the reflection said enthusiastically.

"Thanks," sighed Remus, "but you don't have to try to make me feel better."

"Nonsense," the mirror chided. "I wouldn't lie to you at a time like this. If you looked anything less than reasonable I would have no issues in telling you so."

Remus shook his head and walked away from the mirror. The sound of the door creaking was a welcome distraction.

"Looks like everyone is getting settled," Arthur Weasley said, closing the door behind him. "Harry was running late, but he just got here, so it seems to me that everyone is ready. Ginny was furious with him, of course, but Tonks calmed her down and said that a man is allowed to be late for a wedding so long as he isn't late for his own wedding."

At the mention of her name, Remus perked up. "You saw Tonks?"

"I did, and she asked me to give you this." The other wizard held out a short glass of firewhiskey.

Remus took the glass. "Aren't we supposed to save this until after the wedding?"

"Yes, but Tonks figured you could use something to take the edge off. She said that knowing you, you'll likely wear a hole in the carpet pacing back and forth."

Remus shook his head and took a sip of the bitter liquid. "Did Tonks seem nervous when you saw her?"

"No, not really. She was all smiles from what I could gather."

"She hasn't even tripped on her robes?" Remus asked skeptically.

Arthur laughed. "Would you believe that Andromeda put a protective charm on her gown just in case of an accident. Never mind if Tonks should be injured, but do everything to save the gown."

Remus smiled and took another sip. "And how did she…look?"

"She looked beautiful, which you will see for yourself in a few minutes."

Remus looked at the clock. "Quarter of. Is it me or has time decided to stand still today?"

Arthur laughed. "It's you."

Remus placed his glass on the dresser. "I don't even know why I feel like this. It's completely illogical, isn't it?"

"You mean being nervous on your wedding day?"

"Yes. When I consider that I love her and she loves me, we've been in this relationship for a few years now, even shared a home together, why…how can I be nervous? This is what I want. I want this more than anything, and yet I feel as if I'm about to go mad."

"It's totally normal, Remus," Arthur assured him. "I'd be worried if you weren't nervous."

"Really?"

"Yes. It shows that you're concerned about the outcome – that this is important to you and you want things to go well."

"Were you nervous when you married Molly?"

Arthur snorted. "Is Tonks accident prone?"

Brows arching, Remus said, "That bad, huh?"

"I was terrified. Actually, I was more worried about how the Prewitts would react when they discovered we had eloped."

"Hang on, you and Molly eloped?"

"Yes. Didn't you know?"

"No, I didn't, but I'm starting to get the feeling that eloping is the preferred way to get married. Do you suppose it's too late to convince Tonks that she really doesn't want a big ceremony? We could just run off and get married on our own."

"Considering that everyone is already here, yes, I think it's too late."

Remus shrugged and took another sip of his drink. "It was worth a try. I keep worrying that I'll forget the words of the spell and end up looking like an idiot."

"Don't worry about that. If your mind goes blank, and it probably will, just look at me and I'll prompt you. That's what I'm here for, isn't it?"

There was a knock and a voice sounded from the other side of the door. "Remus?"

"That will be Ginny come to fetch you," Arthur said.

Remus nodded and opened the door to find the youngest Weasley smiling up at him. "I've been sent to tell you that everyone's ready. You just need to take your place and we can get started."

"I've still got ten minutes," Remus said with a final glance at the clock.

Arthur laughed and patted him on the back. "Just a moment ago you were complaining that time wouldn't speed up."

"Speeding up is one thing, " Remus said, taking a deep breath. "Skipping ahead is something entirely different."

The older wizard placed a hand on his shoulder. "Come on. Let's go get you married off."

_5:53 pm that same evening_

Tonks brushed her hand over the front of her dress, smoothing out the fabric as she waited for Ginny to return. Her father stood by her side, watching her with a smile.

"That dress is lovely, darling."

She looked down at herself. "I don't think Remus has ever seen me in a dress. A skirt, yeah. You know, something fun and not too fancy, but never anything like this."

"I can almost guarantee that he won't be able to take his eyes off of you."

"Thanks." Tonks blushed slightly and hoped that Remus would be pleased with her choice. As much as she loved clothes and jewelry, Tonks was never the type of girl to get all fancied up. She enjoyed emphasizing her femininity by wearing jeans that showed off her curves, donning all sorts of pretty earrings and bracelets, and of course there was always the hair color. Long, flowing gowns weren't normally her style, but for her wedding day she thought she could make an exception.

She had chosen a cream colored gown after deciding that a pure white gown not only made her look too pale, but was also too virginal for her tastes, especially under the circumstances. It was made of a smooth silk covered in a soft organza material with long, flowing sleeves and a bodice embellished with tiny pink flowers. She felt the touch of pink went well with her preferred hair color, which she wore slightly longer today than usual, and drew focus on her face more than any other part of her body. It wasn't as if she wanted to hide her pregnancy, she just didn't want it to be the center of attention today. Today was about her and Remus; the baby would get his or her turn in a few months.

Ginny poked her head into the room after knocking gently. "Remus and Dad are outside. So, whenever you're ready, we can start."

"Thanks, Ginny," Tonks said, picking up the small bundle of wild flowers her mother had picked for her that morning.

"By the way, you look beautiful." She smiled and closed the door.

"She's right," Ted said, taking Tonks' hand. "You look absolutely stunning."

Tonks looked up into her father's eyes to find them glossed over with unshed tears. "Oh, Dad. Don't." She wrapped her arms around him in a tight embrace. "If you cry then I'll cry."

"I'm just very happy for you, my little nymph." He released her and brushed his arms down her sleeves. "Now, enough of this or I'm going to spoil your dress, and then your mother would have me cursed."

"She put a charm on it so even I can't mess it up." Tonks smiled brightly. "I love you, Dad."

"I love you, too, sweetheart."

"Just don't let me trip," she said.

"I won't."

With more poise than Tonks thought her father had in him, he offered her his arm, which she took willingly. They exited the room and headed for the back of the house and out into the garden, which her mother had spent hours decorating for the ceremony, even with the help of magic. It was like a wonderland of wild flowers growing under the fading sunlight of the afternoon.

Everyone in attendance stood up as Tonks and her father stepped out from the house. She was sure that all eyes were on her at that very moment, and yet the only set of eyes she felt were Remus'. He followed her every movement as she made her way down the center of the aisle, his eyes never leaving her. The love she felt for him was reflected on his face, and she couldn't help but feel slightly overwhelmed by the intensity of the emotion.

The short journey to the back of the garden ended, and Ted kissed her on the cheek before he turned to Remus and shook his hand. Her father joined her mother along the front row, and Arthur signaled for everyone to take their seats.

"Welcome, everyone, to this special occasion. I'm sure I speak for all of you when I say how happy I am to be invited to take part in such a celebration. I was actually a bit surprised when Remus and Tonks asked me to lead the ceremony today." He paused and looked at the both of them intently. "I'm not a clergy man, and although I may be employed by the Ministry of Magic, I'm not one of the usual officials asked to perform such ceremonies. But I am a husband," he said with pride. "I don't mean to sound boastful, but after nearly thirty years of marriage, I believe I have a good understanding of what it takes to achieve and maintain a successful marriage. I have faith that the two of you possess such qualities, and I've seen them displayed in the way you love and care for one another."

Arthur smiled and clapped his hands together. "But all these people haven't gathered here today to listen to me drone on. It isn't my words they are interested in, but yours. So, Remus," he said signaling to him. "If you would."

Tonks passed her flowers to her mother and saw Remus take a deep breath as he reached for her hands. His eyes searched her face, carefully taking in all her features. "I find myself in…in awe of this moment," he stammered. "I'd like to start by telling you how absolutely stunning you look today." Tonks blushed slightly under his admiring gaze.

"You take my breath away," Remus stated. "You have since the moment I saw you standing by the fireplace at Grimmauld Place nearly six years ago. I remember it like it was yesterday. We've traveled a long road together; one that I hadn't allowed myself to ever believe was possible. Today I find myself enthralled with a person who is just as intelligent and clever as she is beautiful. You bring such laughter and joy to my life, more than I ever thought possible. You are the light in my darkness."

He stepped in closer to her, his voice filled with emotion and affection. "I shudder to think what my life would be without you in it, Nymphadora Tonks. I love you more than I can express with words." He gently kissed her hand, giving her a sign that it was now her turn to speak.

Tonks found herself deeply touched by Remus' words, and she fought back the tears forming in her eyes. Her heart thudded madly in her chest and she felt as if she might faint from the overpowering surge of emotion.

She swayed slightly and felt Remus' hands on her waist steadying her. "Are you all right," he asked with concern.

She nodded and smiled. "I'll be fine. Just don't let go."

"Never."

She took a deep breath and blew it out slowly. "Remus," she said, looking up at him with tenderness. "There's so much I want to say to you right now. My thoughts are all in a jumble in my head. I find that I'm a bit jealous that you were able to get through your speech without mucking it up, when I know very well that I'm going to butcher mine. I was relieved that I made it out here without tripping over my dress." Remus, and several of the guests laughed.

"Seriously, though," she said redirecting the mood. "I know I'm not as eloquent as you are. I suppose it comes from all those books you've read. You're so intelligent, and I've often asked myself, 'What's a smart bloke like him doing with a klutz like me?' I suppose that's why I was so drawn to you right from the start. You always treated me with respect, regardless of my youth or inexperience in certain matters. You would listen to me, I mean really listen, and you valued my opinion."

She grinned at him mischievously. "Imagine my surprise when I discovered that underneath this calm and collected exterior was the heart of a true prankster. Oh, the trouble you can get up to when you set your mind to it." Remus went scarlet at her words. "Whenever times got rough, and there were quite a few of those, you would always find a way to make me laugh...or at least smile. I couldn't help but fall in love with you."

She swallowed before adding, "But I think the thing that will always keep me coming back for more is that you never ask me to be something I'm not. You love me just the way I am, and that's something considering I can be anyone you want me to be."

"I only ever wanted you," Remus said, brushing his hand over her cheek.

"And I only ever wanted you. I love you with all my heart."

Neither one of them spoke another word. They just looked into each other's eyes and reveled in the moment. After a good long while, it was Arthur Weasley who broke the silence.

"And now Remus and Tonks," he said looking from one to the other, "have asked that a binding ceremony be performed. As you all know, a wizard may chose to bind his life to another person for many different reasons. The binding can be done out of a sense of duty, loyalty, or even friendship. In those cases the binding is simply one directional, from the wizard to the person he has chosen to honor. It is a rare instance where both wizards choose to be bound to the other, and even more unique when performed out of love. The binding is unbreakable and irreversible by any means except death, and is looked upon as a sacred commitment in our community."

"Join hands, please," Arthur instructed.

Tonks held up her hands to Remus, who took hold of them as if he were holding something precious and delicate. Her right hand clasped in his right hand, her left in his left. Their wrists criss-crossed, locking their hands together.

"Mea vita est tua vita," Remus said softly.

"Mea vita est tua vita," repeated Tonks.

"Corpore, spiritu, anima te honoro," they said together in unison.

"Ligere," came Arthur Weasley's voice, solid and direct. And with a swish and flick of his wand, the bind was complete.

A silvery, translucent band slowly wrapped itself around Remus' and Tonks' wrists. The brightness of the glowing light was almost blinding, but Tonks squinted her eyes and managed to keep her gaze fixed on Remus as best she could. The radiance of the light pulsated once, twice, three times before breaking into a shower of sparks, illuminating the world around them momentarily.

As the light faded, Tonks saw Remus' lips curve into a wide grin. "I love you," he mouthed at her.

She smiled back at him fully. "I love you, too."

Without even waiting for an invitation from Arthur, Remus leaned towards her and captured her mouth with his. Letting go of her hands, his arms found their way around her waist, pulling her to him as he deepened the kiss. Tonks didn't protest in the slightest and gave in to his kiss with delight.

When the kiss ended, a wave of cheers and applause sounded around them. Tonks couldn't hold back the happy laughter and buried her face in his shoulder. He kissed her hair, holding her tight against him, and Tonks could almost feel the joy radiating from him. Or was it her own happiness that she was feeling? It didn't matter. All that mattered was that he was hers at long last and nothing could take him away from her.

_8:24 pm that night_

The stars sparkled brightly in the dark sky with only a sliver of the waxing moon as their companion. Paying no attention to the heavenly bodies above her, Tonks stared deeply into Remus' eyes as they danced to the romantic music (as opposed to the kind provided by what exactly?). His hands were on her waist and she could feel the heat of them through her gown. Their bodies didn't fit the way they normally did thanks in part to the small, yet noticeable swell of her abdomen. But even so, Tonks could feel the swaying of his hips in rhythm with her own. She let her fingers play with the soft hair that fell over the collar on his neck, knowing full well that touching him like that would drive him wild.

""You realize everyone is watching us, don't you?" Remus said with a smirk.

"Oh yes, I know." Her fingers lightly touched the outside of her ear.

"Then will you please not do that?"

"Do what?" she asked, tilting her chin up so that her mouth was very close to his.

Remus laughed, and she could feel his breath against her skin. "You know very well what you're doing. So if you want to stay at the party any longer I suggest you stop teasing me."

"Who says I want to stay?" Gently, she pulled his face the remaining distance down to hers for a promising kiss that grew in intensity as she slid her mouth over his. Remus breathed deeply when they broke apart. Whistles from Fred and George came from the other side of the garden, making Remus blush. Tonks only laughed.

"What was that you once told me about publicly displaying affection?" Tonks asked, still playing with the hair at his neck. She knew Remus preferred to save the more passionate side of himself for when they were alone together. He would always be attentive to her by holding her hands or keeping his hand on the small of her back. There were even a few kisses shared from time to time. But for the most part, Remus liked to keep his personal life private. Tonks knew that all these kisses out in the open had to be getting to him.

Remus chucked. "I can't think of a larger, more obvious and public display of affection than a wedding. And besides, if I didn't kiss you, and kiss you properly, I think I would hear complaints."

Tonks tossed her head back in a laugh. "Well, I thoroughly enjoy being kissed properly, so feel free to kiss me as often as you like."

"I intend to," he said, brushing his lips against hers. "But this is nothing compared to what I intend to do to you later."

"Do I have your word on that?" she murmured against his mouth.

"I swear that I am up to no good," he whispered, kissing her with all the promise of the future.

"_Mea vita est tua vita. Corpore, spiritu, anima te honoro ."_

"_My life is your life. With my body, breath, and soul, I honor thee."_

Ligere - bind 


End file.
